Three Alpha Bikers Wants An Open Marriage

Chapter 185: Chapter 185

Riley’s POV

"A sin against you"

The moment those words left Carian’s mouth, my heart started pounding so fast it made it hard to think straight, and I could already tell that whatever she was about to say next was not going to be something small or easy to deal with.

She didn’t continue immediately, and that made everything worse because now I was just sitting there, waiting, watching her as she turned her back on me like she was trying to decide how to say it or if she should even say it at all.

"Carian," I called her name for the first time, my voice firm because I didn’t want her dragging this out, "just say it."

She stayed quiet for a few seconds, and those few seconds felt longer than they should have, like she was holding something back that she knew I wasn’t going to like.

Then she finally turned to face me again, and her expression had completely changed. She didn’t look soft or emotional anymore, she looked serious and focused, like she had already made up her mind.

"We were close," she began, her voice steady. "Even though we were different in a lot of ways, we still cared about each other."

I didn’t interrupt her, but I watched her closely, trying to match what she was saying with the flashes of memory I had just started getting back.

"There was someone who used to visit us often," she continued. "A friend of Mom’s, and she didn’t come alone. She always came with one of her sons."

The moment she said that, something clicked in my head, not fully clear but enough to make me pay closer attention, because I remembered something Amelia had said before about being close to my mother. I didn’t say anything, I just let Carian continue.

"I noticed him first," she said. "I liked him, and I didn’t try to hide it."

I raised a brow slightly but stayed silent.

"He didn’t feel the same way," she added. "He barely acknowledged me, and when he did, it was like I didn’t matter at all."

There was no hesitation in her voice, no attempt to soften it, she was just stating it exactly how it happened.

"He was cold," she continued. "Completely uninterested, and it didn’t matter what I did, he didn’t respond to me."

I folded my arms slowly. "So you kept trying anyway," I said.

"Yes," she replied without hesitation. "I thought if I pushed enough, if I kept trying, I could get him to notice me, maybe even change how he saw me."

I shook my head slightly. "And that didn’t work."

"No," she said. "It didn’t."

She paused for a moment, then continued. "Then Mom noticed."

That made me straighten slightly. "What happened?"

"She got angry," Carian said. "Not just a little angry, she was furious."

I frowned. "That doesn’t sound like her without a reason."

"There was a reason," Carian replied. "I just didn’t know it at the time."

I stayed quiet, waiting for her to explain.

"One day she caught me trying to talk to him again," she continued. "She dragged me away from him and she hit me."

I blinked, caught off guard. "She hit you?"

"Yes," Carian said. "It was the first time she had ever done that."

I didn’t like that at all. "What did she say?"

"She told me to stay away from him," Carian replied. "She said he was dangerous, that he had a bad temper, and that I should never go near him again."

I frowned deeper. "That still doesn’t explain anything and why she would hit you."

"There’s more," she said.

I nodded for her to continue.

"She said there was only one person allowed to be close to him," Carian added.

Something in me tensed immediately. "Who?"

She looked straight at me. "You."

I blinked, confused. "Why me?"

"I didn’t understand it either," she said. "And that made it worse for me."

I shook my head slightly. "This doesn’t make sense."

"It didn’t make sense to me either," she replied. "But I still saw what was happening."

I leaned forward slightly. "What do you mean?"

"I became jealous," she said. "Even though it was obvious you didn’t know what was going on."

I didn’t like where this was heading. "What did you do?"

"I started using you," she said.

Her answer was direct and immediate, and it made my chest tighten slightly.

"What do you mean you used me?" I asked.

"I put you in situations where you would be around him," she explained. "I made sure you were always close enough for him to notice you, and it worked."

I stared at her. "You set it up?"

"Yes," she said.

I didn’t speak for a moment because I was trying to process that properly.

"You don’t remember it now," she continued, "but you will when your memories come back fully."

That didn’t make me feel better at all.

"He started paying attention," she said. "But not to me. To you."

I clenched my jaw slightly. "And that wasn’t what you wanted."

"No," she said. "It wasn’t."

I took a slow breath. "Then why did it happen?"

She went quiet again, and I could already tell this was where things were about to get worse.

"Carian," I said, my voice more serious now, "why did he focus on me?"

She looked at me, and this time she didn’t avoid it.

"Because you were his bloodhost," she said.

The words hit me immediately.

I didn’t even need time to think about it because my mind jumped straight to one memory, the moment Gunnar lost control and almost drained me completely.

I swallowed slowly. "That’s why," I said. "That’s why he couldn’t stop himself."

"Yes," she replied. "That’s why he was drawn to you and not me."

I ran a hand through my hair, trying to process everything because now things were starting to connect in a way that made me uncomfortable.

"So all of that," I said, "everything that happened back then... it wasn’t random." frёewebnoѵēl.com

"No," she said. "It wasn’t."

I exhaled slowly. "There’s more, isn’t there?"

"Yes," she replied.

I looked at her again. "Then say it."

She hesitated for a brief moment, and that hesitation made me fidget a bit again because it meant whatever she was about to say next was worse than everything she had already told me.

"After I found out," she said slowly, "I did something I wasn’t supposed to do."

My heart started racing again. "What does that mean?"

"We were young, I was young," she said. "I wasn’t thinking clearly."

"That’s not an answer," I said. "What did you do?"

She looked at me, and this time there was no way to ignore the tension in her expression.

"I did something forbidden," she said.

I took a step closer. "Carian, stop going around it and just tell me already."

She didn’t respond immediately, and for a second it felt like she might actually refuse to say it.

I didn’t move. I didn’t look away. I just waited.

"What did you do?"