Free Web NovelChapter 119: Am I Undesirable?
The respect Skyla held for Zyair just shot through the roof and she knew she didn’t even deserve him after the harsh words she had said to him. The tears were leaking from her eyes now. freeweɓnovēl.coɱ
"He is amazing beyond words," she squeaked with a sniffle while wiping her tears.
"Yes, he is. He took care of us for years without telling anyone. Paid for our school fees, and helped my siblings until I decided to come work for him and became his apprentice."
He paused again, a heavy pause.
"The point is, he didn’t have to do all that for a stranger and yet he did. Made me into the man I am today. I would gladly lay my life for him and I want to see him happy. You make him happy, I don’t know what the real story is but there is more than what meets the eye. I have known him for nine years now and I have never seen him with a woman. He avoids them due to reasons known to him. But you Miss Skyla are an exception. Do you have any idea how disturbed he was when you met with that accident?"
She shook her head because Zyair had been all but keeping a happy visage in front of her.
"He is a man of principles and he would never chase you if you had been happily married but I think he knew about your turbulent marriage from the start and he wants to help you escape it. Let him help do it, I request of you."
Lawrence pleaded with her. How was Skyla to inform him that was exactly the reason she couldn’t involve him in her mess? She could never let him get hurt because he decided to stand with her.
"I know it’s a lot but I beg you to consider it. Men like him don’t exist, men who are in such high posts, don’t care. He does and believe me when I say this, he cares very deeply for you. Don’t push him away."
Skyla was lost, with everything Lawrence had said, it began to make her feel more guilty. He took his leave after this and she was left grappling with her thoughts.
She was at such a crossroads. While her heart craved him and everything he personified, her brain told her it was wise to stay away and not push him towards more danger.
She headed down and checked out the rehearsals and arrangements for their upcoming event but her heart was left upstairs with the man in a mask.
Her focus was disturbed and she would find herself too distracted. It was torture a very special kind of torture for her and she couldn’t wait for her day to end so she could go home.
They had their lunch date as usual. She opened the door with a very palpitating heart and sweaty hands. Zyair was standing there with his back to her, legs spread and both his hands thrust deeply into his pockets.
"Good afternoon," she greeted him.
"Good afternoon," his voice was dangerously calm and void of emotions. She gulped and proceeded to her table. He quietly did the same.
"How are preparations going?" He asked in a monotone.
"Good, it’s coming together nicely now." She filled him in with all the details and he listened calmly and quietly, not disturbing her. free𝑤ebnovel.com
Once she was done giving him the daily lunch report, Zyair spoke.
"Skyla!" There was this urgency in his voice.
"Zyair!" She couldn’t help but repeat his name.
"Will you tell me something sincerely?" He questioned, his voice not as controlled as he always kept.
"Yes!"
"Do you find me so undesirable that you won’t even try to give us a chance? I know my past is far from being dignified and I don’t even belong to a noble family. But can you not just give it some thought?"
His words bordered on pain and hurt and it ripped Skyla’s fragile heart apart. She had not meant for him to take her words in this context.
"Undesirable? No, I can never find you undesirable. Why would you think like that?" She asked in a pained voice.
"What you said, this was the only conclusion I could draw," he honestly told her.
"Stop doing that, please. Don’t make me more guilty than what I already am." She pleaded, trying to keep her voice from falling apart.
"Then why? What’s stopping you?"
"I don’t want to have this conversation right now. I am heading downstairs to the Anime Department." She didn’t want to answer his difficult questions. She had no answers.
This whole Pandora’s box of complexities which had opened was draining her. She had no clue how to handle these raw emotions that were erupting in her heart, which were suffocating her as if she couldn’t get enough oxygen.
He sighed, she was running away instead of facing the truth. What would it take for her to open up?
He got up and watched her depart, taking away that sunny disposition with her, leaving him icy cold.
Zyair was afraid to push her further. What if she decided to leave the job because he was making her uncomfortable? The thought was disturbing and it rattled him to his core.
Skyla had become his addiction although he took no drugs and yet it was the worst kind of addiction. The survival was thinning out without her remaining in his life.
At least she didn’t find him undesirable, maybe she said that only to not break his heart.
Zyair had never been so frustrated over a girl in his entire life. Then he had never been in a relationship. He had never fallen in love and had never felt so insecure about himself.
All these emotions were fairly new for him too and he wanted to navigate through them carefully. But since he had discovered who she was to him that control he prided himself on was slowly and gradually slipping away.
He would give her time but he wouldn’t back down from pursuing her. If there was even a slim chance that she would have him he would take it.
"Oh! Dear lord, give me the strength to deal with all this." He willed himself to move and finally made his way to his office.
