Free Web NovelChapter 402: Chapter 400: The Matter of the Child
Although Gu’er understood Sun Jiaming, she couldn’t tell him that she really hadn’t wanted children back then.
"Gu’er, in your dream... did you have any children?"
When Gu’er didn’t answer, Sun Jiaming asked again. As he spoke, his body tensed and his heart leaped into his throat. He knew it was just a dream and couldn’t be taken seriously, yet he couldn’t understand why he was so nervous.
"No."
Gu’er paused before answering. Before Sun Jiaming could even sigh in relief, she added, "In my dream, all I remember is Zhang Da hitting and cursing me. I dreamed of many other things, but very little about myself. It was only one night, so I couldn’t have dreamed of too much. And as for you, I never heard anyone in the dream say you and Zhou Mei had children."
Gu’er’s words finally put Sun Jiaming’s heart at ease. ’Neither of us had children. That’s good.’
But then he found it a little amusing. ’It’s just a dream, why do I care so much?’ Maybe it was because so much of it felt real. Deep down, he felt Gu’er’s dream was too strange, and he was taking it a bit too seriously. But then he’d think about it and realize it was impossible. While many real events appeared in Gu’er’s dream, there were inconsistencies too. It was just as he’d said yesterday: perhaps Heaven, seeing how hard Gu’er’s life was back then, had sent her a dream of the future. It was a warning, a chance for her to change her own destiny.
Their lives now were completely different from the dream, which proved things had changed. He couldn’t keep dwelling on Gu’er’s dream. ’I should just forget about it.’
Gu’er could feel Sun Jiaming relax. ’I’m not trying to deceive him on purpose.’ It was just that if she told him she’d had a child, and then explained how badly that child had treated her, he would surely feel sorry for her, but wouldn’t he also feel a little uncomfortable? Even if it was just a dream, wouldn’t the thought of her having a child with another man upset him? That’s why Gu’er preferred to tell him she didn’t have any children, so it wouldn’t bother him. As for herself, she also needed to break free from her past life. ’I’ll just treat it as a dream and stop thinking about it.’
"So, about having children?"
Sun Jiaming, now reassured about the dream, brought up the topic of children again. ’If Gu’er’s reservations aren’t because of having children in the dream, then what is it?’
"I never said I didn’t want children."
Gu’er’s words took Sun Jiaming by surprise. He had spent all day pondering and wrestling with this. Based on what Gu’er had said back then, he had truly believed she didn’t plan on having children, which was why he wanted to ask her for the reason.
"The reason I asked you back then—what you would do if I didn’t want children, and if you would still marry me—is because I know a lot of men only get married to have kids. Just look at those three from the Zhou family, they treat my mom terribly. Back then, I really detested that sister and her two brothers. I thought that if I were to have three children like them, it would be better not to have any at all. I also wanted to know how much you truly cared for me, so that’s why I asked. It didn’t mean I really don’t want children. And after we got married, my constant washing isn’t to avoid getting pregnant. You know I just like to be clean. Look at Auntie and the others, they only bathe every few days, and some people in the village go even longer because it’s a hassle to get water. But I feel awful if I don’t wash up. I wasn’t thinking about anything else. As for children... I really hope to have a child with you. Ideally, a son and a daughter. A son who looks like you, and a daughter who looks like me. Having both would be wonderful, wouldn’t it?"
Sun Jiaming never expected Gu’er to say that. He pulled her into a tight hug. ’So I misunderstood her all along.’
"I’m sorry, Gu’er. I was overthinking things. I thought you had something on your mind that you weren’t telling me, so I wanted to know what you were thinking."
Sun Jiaming apologized to Gu’er.
"You don’t have to apologize to me. We’re a married couple who will spend the rest of our lives together. It’s best to just say what’s on our minds. Jia Ming, if I ever do anything wrong, or if you have something on your mind, you have to tell me. That’s the only way I’ll understand. If we open up to each other, we can understand one another. Otherwise, if a rift forms between us, there will be problems sooner or later."
Gu’er said to Sun Jiaming with sincerity.
"Mm, I know. You too. If you have anything you want to say, just tell me."
Sun Jiaming nodded, lovingly stroking Gu’er’s face.
"Okay."
Gu’er hugged Sun Jiaming back. ’After this, he’ll be at ease and won’t let his imagination run wild anymore.’ As for herself, she couldn’t keep preventing pregnancy. ’Well then, I’ll just let nature take its course. If it happens, I’ll happily become a mother. In my last life, I didn’t know how to raise a child. This life, I’ll study hard and raise one with Sun Jiaming. There’s no way it’ll be like my last life, right?’
"Oh, right."
Gu’er seemed to remember something. She looked up at Sun Jiaming and said, "On our wedding day, remember when I drank a lot of water and went to the restroom? When I came out, I ran into Li Zhi. He told me that Zhou Mazi had shown up with two other men. Apparently, they were looking for my mom to get money, and they were looking for me too. He said they planned to cause a scene at our wedding if they didn’t get it. Li Zhi had people stationed at the door, and they grabbed them when they saw them acting suspiciously. He came to ask me what to do. There were too many people that day, so he spoke to me quietly. I told him to have someone beat Zhou Mazi up and send him away. When we were talking, I was afraid someone would overhear, so we stood a little close. But even then, we were still a full step apart. Who said we were hugging? Did you ask Zhou Fugui who saw it? Who’s spreading these malicious rumors?"
Gu’er hadn’t explained this before. She only brought it up now, after she and Sun Jiaming had talked things through. She did it because she knew he hadn’t doubted her, which made her want to tell him.
"It was Zhou Mei. A lot of people from the Zhou family came that day, right? Zhou Mei didn’t come to the house; it seems she went straight to the restaurant. There were so many people I didn’t even notice. I had no idea she was there. She must have seen you and Li Zhi talking and just made things up."
Sun Jiaming thought back to when he first heard the rumor from Zhou Fugui. His immediate reaction was that it was impossible. He had absolute faith in Gu’er, and he trusted Li Zhi, too. But Zhou Fugui had described it so vividly, even naming the location. He had scolded Zhou Fugui right then and there, telling him that since things hadn’t worked out between him and Zhou Mei, she was just saying it out of revenge—that it was pure slander. In reality, he had suspected that perhaps Gu’er had a little too much to drink, felt dizzy, and Li Zhi had helped steady her. He figured Zhou Mei must have seen that and, out of resentment, exaggerated the story. He never imagined that Zhou Mei had only seen Gu’er and Li Zhi talking and would twist it into them hugging.
When he saw Gu’er and Li Zhi return that evening, talking and laughing, his heart had skipped a beat. He’d realized that Gu’er was also very happy when she was with Li Zhi. But he immediately knew he was wrong. ’Doesn’t everyone have friends? I get along great with Li Zhi and Dingzi.’ Gu’er and Li Zhi’s friendship was open and proper; he couldn’t let himself be suspicious. He knew that once a seed of doubt is planted, it’s difficult to uproot. That was why he’d decided to talk to Gu’er. He hoped they could clear the air, and he also wanted her to be aware of the rumor. Once they talked it through, they could move past it.
——————
One more update to come, but it might be a little late.
