Free Web NovelChapter 23: Chapter 23: Don’t Be So Hungry You Eat Shit
The tranquilizer was still in the captured animals’ systems.
After they were photographed for evidence, registered, and handed over, they all had to be taken to the wildlife protection center for a few days of observation before their release could be arranged.
The Wolf King trusted Gu Zhao, so he left with his pack.
The little lynx was too young to hunt and couldn’t be raised by Gu Zhao, so it had to be taken away with its mother.
As they parted, it obediently kissed Gu Zhao’s hand, then the hand of a stiff-bodied Gu Xulin.
"Brother, did you realize animals aren’t so scary after all?" Gu Zhao asked, looking at the still-stiff Gu Xulin.
Gu Xulin was stubborn. "I was never scared, okay?"
The two of them also left the forest, only to be promptly taken to the station to give a statement.
By the time they finished giving their statements and came out, the sky was already dark.
They both looked pale and numb.
Those bizarre questions were truly exhausting.
Especially the last part... they actually wanted Gu Zhao, a five-year-old child, to join them!!
"Starving. I finally get why that dumb tiger fell for it. If someone offered to take me for a meal right now, I’d go too," Gu Xulin said, his stomach aching with hunger.
Gu Zhao was fine; she had been plied with snacks by a crowd of people inside.
"Brother, that car looks familiar." Gu Zhao stopped and looked at the car parked in front of the station.
Gu Xulin looked over. "Isn’t that Second Brother’s car?"
He was a little surprised. His second brother usually hated trouble and did his best to avoid the whole family, so why was he here today?
’Second Brother?’
Gu Zhao’s eyes narrowed. ’I remember now!!’
’He’s the villain who brought me back but wouldn’t raise me, dumping me on Gu Xulin!!’
Gu Zhao marched over furiously on her little short legs, but because they were so short, she lacked any intimidating presence and looked more like she was running over to act cute.
"You little traitor! That’s too much! He brought you back and just dumped you on me! For the past few days, I’m the one who’s been..." ’...taking care of you.’
’Okay,’ Gu Xulin felt a little guilty, but on second thought, ’is there anything wrong with a little sister taking care of her older brother?’
"I’m the one who’s been looking after you! You can’t just abandon me the second he shows up! That’s what a player would do!" Gu Xulin ground his teeth, but still had to hurry to catch up.
Gu Zhao had no time to coddle her fourth brother right now. She went to the car, jumped up, and started slapping the rear window.
The rear window rolled down, revealing Gu Yunqi’s lazy face. There were dark circles under his eyes, as if he’d pulled an all-nighter.
"You shameless beast! Leaving a kid behind like it’s nothing! You’re completely and utterly shameless!" Gu Zhao ranted, hands on her hips.
But the person in the car was completely unfazed. He just gave a lazy yawn. "How come your teeth haven’t grown in yet? You’re so ugly. At least you can talk properly now."
Gu Zhao: ...
A total defeat.
"Tsk, been playing beggar?" Gu Yunqi then looked at the resentful-looking Gu Xulin. "Or a pouty little newlywed? Don’t give me that pathetic look. If your brain is full of water, go pour it out."
Gu Xulin: ...
Another total defeat.
"Get in the car. I don’t want to see a news headline saying, ’Turns out these two idiots are from the Gu Family.’ How embarrassing." Gu Yunqi’s tone was full of disgust.
Gu Zhao and Gu Xulin got in the car without thinking. Only after they were seated did they both realize what had happened.
’Why did we get in?! Don’t we have any pride?!’
’Besides! How is Gu Zhao an idiot? Clearly, only Fourth Brother is the idiot.’
Gu Xulin, on the other hand, wondered how he was an idiot. ’Clearly, only Gu Zhao is the idiot.’
"Second Brother, fess up. What are you really here for?" Gu Xulin watched him warily, afraid he was here to take the child.
’It’s not that he cared that much about Gu Zhao... it’s just that the variety show wasn’t finished filming yet!’
’Absolutely cannot hand her over! This is all for work!’
Gu Yunqi gave his younger brother a complicated look, then glanced at Gu Zhao. He suddenly felt that his brother really had it rough.
’He had two of these idiots in his family.’
"To clean up your mess." Gu Yunqi grew serious. "Gu Xulin! Gu Zhao is young and doesn’t know any better, but you don’t either? Whether it’s real or not, understanding and commanding animals—do you think that’s something she should be displaying in the public eye?"
"Do you want her to be dissected so you can get a new little sister? If you have that thought, just tell me directly. I’ll go find one for you."
Gu Xulin felt his second brother was making a big deal out of nothing. "Bro, everyone will just think it’s for the show, part of the entertainment. And the SWAT team definitely won’t go around talking."
"But her surname is Gu—the Gu of the Gu Family! It doesn’t matter if netizens care, but what about *them*?" Gu Yunqi snapped.
Gu Xulin’s face paled as he understood. He stammered in a panic, "Aren’t they... aren’t the dead ones dead, and the living ones all in prison?"
"Then how do you think Third Brother went missing?"
"Didn’t Third Brother... lose contact... while working in the wilderness..." He fell silent.
"What do you mean... Second Brother... What happened to Third Brother?!"
Gu Yunqi didn’t elaborate, changing the subject instead. "I had Eldest Brother coordinate to suppress the situation, so they won’t target her so quickly. If you think the lesson from Mom, Dad, and Third Brother isn’t enough, then you just keep fooling around with her."
The car stopped. Gu Yunqi spoke coldly to the dazed Gu Xulin and the bewildered Gu Zhao. "Get out."
After Gu Zhao got out, she watched the departing car and felt a sense of familiarity.
The only difference was that this time, there was a dazed person next to her.
"Fourth Brother, what was all that coded talk about?" Gu Zhao was extremely curious.
Gu Xulin looked like his soul had left his body, completely zoned out.
Gu Zhao frowned, then shouted, "I miss my men!"
Gu Xulin snapped back from his stupor as if a bucket of ice water had been dumped over his head. His neck twisted at a stiff angle.
"Men? What damn men?! I’ll beat them into eunuchs!" The blankness in his eyes hadn’t fully faded before it was covered by a layer of frantic anger.
"It’s late at night... Master Kang, Master Bao, Mala Prince, Zhang Liang, Yang Guofu. Where are you all?" Gu Zhao clutched her stomach.
"If I don’t see you again soon, I’m going to say goodbye to this world." Gu Zhao’s expression was full of drama.
Gu Xulin laughed in exasperation. "Let’s go home. I’ll order you whatever you want."
When the food delivery arrived, the courier gave Gu Xulin a strange look, one that seemed to contain a hint of guilt.
Gu Xulin was puzzled. ’Could he be a male fan?’
Gu Xulin asked, "Want an autograph?"
"Sorry, buddy. I’ll be faster next time. But please, don’t eat poop when you’re hungry!"
Silence...
SLAM! Gu Xulin shut the door.
Gu Xulin sniffed his sleeve.
It seemed... it had gotten a bit marinated in the smell.
He then grabbed Gu Zhao, pulled her over, and sniffed. Stinky.
They both reeked. It must have been hard on the police officers who took their statements.
Gu Xulin suddenly understood why his second brother had been so grumpy.
After showering, the two of them sat comfortably on the floor, eating their delicious food.
Just then, the door opened. The moment his agent, Brother Wang, stepped inside and saw the scene, he felt his blood pressure skyrocket.
"Gu Xulin!! Stop eating! You’re a celebrity, damn it!! Put it down!"
Hearing this, Gu Xulin immediately stuffed a few more bites of fried chicken into his mouth.
"ARGHHH!" Brother Wang felt like his career was about to go down the drain! He immediately lunged forward to dig the food out of Gu Xulin’s mouth. "Spit it out!"
A chaotic scene of chickens flying and dogs jumping ensued.
Gu Zhao watched the drama unfold as she finished all the food.
In the end, all three of them were sitting on the floor, the sofa like a mere decoration.
Brother Wang poured himself a glass of water and handed Gu Xulin his phone, which he had been holding onto. "You two need to do a livestream in a bit to let everyone know you’re safe. People are worried."
