Free Web NovelChapter 45: So Wake Me Up When It’s All Over
[SERGEI]
Sergei was desperate. For anything. For any response.
So, when they got to Katya’s residence and the omega was put to sleep, cleaned up, and everything sorted, Sergei knew he had to think.
There was no way that Katya would want to see him first when he woke up. It was just going to be too much, and as much as Sergei wanted to give him an explanation to make it better for Katya, the alpha knew that was a volatile area.
He knew that shit could go sideways real fast, and he would die if he lost Katya. It was even an exaggeration at this point. freeweɓnovēl.coɱ
Perhaps that was why he had sent cars for Katya’s friends.
"What are you doing out here? Katya is awake," Anya called out an hour later when Sergei had still refused to walk into the house.
He could have taken coffee, tried to calm down, but his mind was whirling with questions, things that even he didn’t understand.
The atmosphere around them wasn’t any better because all the staff were terrified of whatever would happen.
They knew this was the craziest state they had seen their boss in, and coupled with the fact that Sergei had been here early this morning, this was technically a danger zone.
"I’m waiting for someone," Sergei said, not letting Anya know more.
But Anya was never able to stay still in silence. She had questions, and as someone who had known Sergei most of his life, she could already suspect what he was thinking.
"The two cars, I suppose," Anya said carefully, and Sergei turned to look at her, shifting his gaze from the huge black gates like this right here was not what he had wanted.
But what use was hiding things from the one woman who always had his back, regardless of what he wanted to do? What use was playing secretly in a space that reeked of chaos and insanity that was already brewing?
Sergei knew his karma would come.
And Anya knew hell was its way over.
"Maybe they can help him get through the day... I’ll pay them. I already told their companies I’ll compensate them as long as they stay here," Sergei added like it were the most normal of things, and Anya sighed.
Honestly, this was not something she could’ve talked Sergei out of because he had made up his mind. But it didn’t make it any easier.
"How are you holding up, Serge?" Anya asked softly.
She could tell he was wrecked, that seeing Katya like that had ruined him. She knew he was already blaming himself, and she would probably try to find a better solution to the kind of things that he didn’t know about yet.
She knew. And it was haunting for him because at the end of the day, there was never going to be a way for him to understand. Or maybe there would be, but what the heck, right?
"I’m fine. Just need them to get here so I can go back to work. Can’t leave the company without executives, and Yaroslav isn’t exact got to be thrilled that his omega is in a different residence from him," Sergei said passively.
It was then that Anya knew.
Sergei was locking her out. Locking everyone out.
Normal Sergei would never have talked about Katya as Yaroslav’s omega.
The alpha was trying to control the situation even though it was hurting him. And fuck if that wasn’t the most Sergei thing ever. The man always cared more about those who meant shit to him more than he cared about himself.
Anya wanted to discourage him, to tell him to wait a few more hours. To stay beside Katya, but she had seen how scared he still was. How he was walking on thin ice whenever the name Katya was mentioned.
"The bleeding... it wasn’t your fault," Anya said quietly.
Sergei couldn’t help but let out a scoff.
"Yeah, right. Because I wasn’t the one who stood still and watched like an idiot as he bent down to kiss my feet, which by the way had me burning that shit already. I hurt him, Anya. I did this to him, and no amount of sugarcoating is going to fix it.
"I can either wallow in self-pity or make things easier for him. We both know the only easy thing for me to do right now is leave his sight. I’m not saying I am going to disappear again;
"... but I think putting distance between him and me would do him any good," Sergei said, like he had done the math in his head, like he had considered everything, and this was the only way out.
It was almost depressing how right he was. fгee𝑤ebɳoveɭ.cøm
How willing he was to actually stay away this time.
The one time Anya wanted him to stay. Fuck.
Maybe because he knew that at the end of the day, he only had his beloved to worry about. Because if he lost Katya, he wasn’t sure what he would do. That was the one thing that Sergei refused to want to find out.
He couldn’t lose him.
He wouldn’t.
"It’s been happening for a while... Sergei. Just spotting sometimes. The doctors said it would happen for some time, until a month or two had passed. This wasn’t your doing," Anya tried to reason.
Sergei sighed.
He wanted to believe her.
Gods, he wanted to, but still it didn’t make it any easier knowing that Moskowsky was still involved in Katya’s suffering.
They were bad for the omega, yet Sergei just couldn’t stay away.
Even if he tried it, he kept failing because part of him would always want to be around Katya; always.
"You know... he looked so beautiful today. I wanted to run and kiss him. Breathe him in. I wanted to hug him and never let him go. He looked like an angel, and fuck, I had even practiced how to say good morning without creeping him out.
"Then I panicked when I saw him getting closer. I... I didn’t know what to do, and I couldn’t stand there like a barbaric idiot. I’m starting to think maybe I should have. Because look where we are," Sergei sighed I defeat.
His admission had Anya letting out a soft chuckle.
It was strange how she could still see the good in the man that everyone feared, and the man who was at risk of losing the one person who meant the world to him. But maybe the alpha just had to have faith this time, right?
"It only means you care about him," Anya said, like it was obvious.
Sergei glared at Anya.
"Of course, I care. Why the hell would I give him everything I have then? Why would I stay away to make sure he was comfortable? I admit, watching over him during the nights wasn’t exactly me staying away...
"But Anya, he didn’t know. He never had to...never needed to, not even once. And now, on the day that was supposed to be a regular day for him, I managed to push him into overdosing on pills," Sergei sighed frustratedly.
He was losing his shit here, and he was not even close to done. But what use was it when everything was done and dusted? He couldn’t turn back time, and there was no amount of power that he could use to reverse anything.
He was doomed.
The mighty Sergei Moskowsky was truly powerless for the third time in three weeks.
Goodness, there was no way out of this for him, was there?
"Sergei..." Anya trailed off, like she was about to break his heart even more.
"Don’t tell me you see the good in me just because you care about me. He almost died, Anya. My Solnyshka almost died, and there is nothing that can make that better, ever.
"I am supposed to be his protector, not the one who tries to kill him on his third week at work. I want him happy... but all I’ve been doing is—" Sergei sighed, not completing his sentence.
Anya suddenly smacked him on the back of his head.
"Shut up and listen to me, you brat," Anya scolded, and Sergi huffed.
"The pills..."
"Anya..."
"They were panic attack pills, Sergei," Anya said, like that was supposed to comfort the alpha.
It did.
For a moment.
"Great. I managed to get my Solnyshka so scared that he had a panic attack. I’m leaving. His friends will be here in a few minutes. Just... don’t tell him about me being here... please," Sergei said before he left.
