Free Web NovelChapter 2676: Chapter 1808: WAAAAAGH! (Ate Too Much Lunch, Got Indigestion)
If there is any battle in this world that is exhilarating and without concern, then fighting with the green skins must be at the top of the list.
You don’t need to ponder over life, nor do you need to consider any strategies or tactics. All you need to do is...
"WAAAAAAGH!!"
Deafening roars echoed around Duanmu Huai’s ears. The green skin’s ugly face opened its bloody mouth and charged in front of him. The raised axe in its hand hacked down forcefully, bouncing off Duanmu Huai’s armor. Then Duanmu Huai swung back with a hammer, smashing its body into pieces.
At the same time, his Thunder Warhammer circled around Duanmu Huai’s body, everything in its path was crushed into debris. Duanmu Huai could feel those sturdy green skins’ bodies breaking under the pounding of his War Hammer, the feeling was akin to winning a prize from smashing a golden egg – providing an enjoyable feedback. Every roar of the green skins seemed like cheers, every splatter of flesh was like an exploding firework.
Duanmu Huai even felt that he wasn’t fighting, but smashing Easter eggs; every swing of the War Hammer caused a burst of fireworks, and the surrounding green skins seemed to be celebrating him, cheering and watching excitedly. They shouted loudly, cheered, and praised their own strength and power.
All these sounds penetrated his armor, vibrating Duanmu Huai’s muscles, making him feel like he was receiving a comprehensive sonic massage.
He even heard music from beside his ear, brilliant, intense, and wonderful.
♪I have a darling baby, my favorite♪
♪Nowhere can find a girl like her♪
♪Oh gosh, she has everything, but never calm♪
♪Just like a little atomic bomb♪
♪Atomic bomb, BABY, little atomic bomb♪
♪I want to place her in my room♪
♪She’s just like my dream♪
♪A million times more explosive than TNT~~♪
"Boom—————!"
A giant as tall as a Titan dispersed the orc group, striding forward to Duanmu Huai; it was an orc "Titan," it looked like some useless artisan had forcibly assembled it from random scrap metal in a junkyard, as with the architecture here. However, its combat power was comparable to an Imperial Titan, but for Duanmu Huai, this big iron figure wasn’t big enough nor good enough!
"Hoo—————"
The big iron figure stomped down toward Duanmu Huai; its foot was even larger than his whole body, one stomp could turn Duanmu Huai into minced meat. Yet, facing the big iron figure’s attack, Duanmu Huai merely gripped his War Hammer tightly with both hands, swinging upward forcefully at the descending iron foot.
The War Hammer, shining with Thunder and Lightning, collided with the descending iron foot, and then directly turned the latter into a pile of scrap in physical terms. The scrap metal forming the legs of the big iron figure exploded and shattered, and the off-balanced giant fell sideways with a crash.
"WAAAAAAGH!"
For other races, even Space Undead facing such an extraordinary battle might wish to temporarily avoid the sharpness and seek other solutions. However, these green skins did not retreat; instead, they grew more frenzied. The green skins’ thought process was simple: this big iron figure defeated that big iron figure, so it shows he is the most formidable big iron figure here! Then, just defeating him would make oneself the best, strongest green skin!
So, they cheered and screamed again, just like chasing-star fans seeing a celebrity, scrambling towards Duanmu Huai once more!
"Come, come again!"
And Duanmu Huai didn’t try to dodge. He loved this kind of fight where punches meet flesh, no schemes, no tricks, no tactics, no strategies, just do it! Either you kill me, or I kill you! This is a fight! This is war! This is WAAAAAGH!!
The boiling hot blood within him made Duanmu Huai feel as if he’d drunk a large bottle of Er Guotou, comfortably energized all over, with the only thing firing in his brain being ignited hot blood. Watching these green skins, he only felt they were growing fair-featured and cute.
The orcs scrambled to pounce on him, hugging Duanmu Huai’s body from all directions, grabbing his legs and arms, trying to pry open Duanmu Huai’s thick armor. Faced with this scene, Duanmu Huai merely laughed and flipped the switch on his left-hand Thermite Bomb.
Simultaneously, the song beside Duanmu Huai’s ear also became more joyful.
♪Atomic bomb, BABY, she can initiate♪
♪Countless chain reactions in my heart♪
♪Big explosion, loud and strong♪
♪Mushroom cloud pushed me to the sky♪
"Boom—————————!"
"Whoa!"
The deafening boom and explosion in the distance scared Pado Filis, making her almost jump directly from the ground, her tail stood straight, and her ears were perked up high.
"What’s, what’s, what’s happening?"
"Uh... it seems... Great Judge... self-destructed...?"
Alicia was also momentarily uncertain. She and Eden were responsible for support and reconnaissance at the rear, and naturally, they saw the scene ahead where Duanmu Huai fought with the orcs. Honestly, the orcs’ fearless fanaticism indeed greatly shocked the pair, and Duanmu Huai’s mad slaughter equally left them feeling astonished, especially when those orcs rushed forward and buried Duanmu Huai, only for him to explode directly afterward!? Can this really happen?
"Great Judge self-destructed? Is he okay? Should we continue the mission?"
Before Alicia answered Pado Filis’ query, an iron block trailing black smoke descended from the sky, crashing heavily to the ground, even as to leave a huge crater where it landed.
Yet, in the next moment, Duanmu Huai climbed out from it again.
"Come again! Still haven’t had enough fun yet!"
Duanmu Huai’s roar echoed in the sky, even Alicia heard the echo from Pado Filis on the other side of the communication terminal.
"...Seems like he’s fine."
"Then I’ll continue..."
"Be quick, the orcs... are coming more and more."
Alicia wasn’t exaggerating; Duanmu Huai indeed took down quite a few orcs, but more orcs were coming from all directions, making Alicia and Eden, hiding high up, feel anxious. Luckily, those orcs seemed to only have eyes for Duanmu Huai and didn’t notice their existence. Otherwise, if they were discovered in this situation, Alicia wasn’t sure if she and Eden could escape unscathed.
Pado Filis probably had even less hope.
Facing the surging orcs, Duanmu Huai stood atop the fallen corpse of the Orc Titan, continuing to swing his War Hammer and mercilessly smashing the charging orcs into pulp again. Meanwhile, he started humming a song; the tune was light and lively, fully demonstrating Duanmu Huai’s joyful mood at the moment.
♪ Hey, has anyone heard of a man named Butcher Pete ♪
♪ Oh, Pete just ran into this town, he’s gonna mess with all the women’s meat ♪
Duanmu Huai shook his head, and as he raised his War Hammer against the green skins in front of him.
♪ He messes, pounds, and slaps ♪
♪ He messes, pounds, and slaps ♪
♪ He messes, pounds, and slaps the meat ♪
The War Hammer lifts and falls to the music, and then lifts again and falls. The green blood splattered, organs and bones shattering, flesh exploding. The blackened remnants from the explosion got smeared with a layer of bloody flesh color. Duanmu Huai still shook his head as if addicted in a karaoke room; he even felt everything at this moment was so wonderful. The green-skinned youngsters surrounding him seemed like disco dancers, and he was amid them, happily dancing, singing, and killing.
♪ Butcher Pete has a long blade ♪
♪ Once he starts, he can’t stop ♪
♪ Guys, better keep an eye on your wives ♪
♪ Because Pete doesn’t care whose meat he’s messing with ♪
The brilliance around grew even brighter, Duanmu Huai felt like he was soaring to immortality, the feedback from slaughter and destruction transmitted through his wrist to every corner of his body, he even felt his cells swelling rapidly, contracting, then swelling again. Indeed, he’s the top tough Big Iron! No one is my match! Big Iron will destroy everything! Until the end of WAAAAAAGH!
Duanmu Huai comfortably twisted his body, waving his War Hammer, feeling the shocks from punches and bullets landing on him from all directions. He even seemed to see two green skins of similar shape as him smiling as they swirled around him, twisting bodies, singing together, and dancing together.
♪ Ever since Pete ran into this town ♪
♪ His courage kept growing ♪
♪ He messes several miles at a time ♪
♪ Unmarried, married, even spares no old ladies ♪
♪ Wakes up in the morning, just half past five ♪
♪ Messes from sunrise to sunset ♪
♪ I don’t know how he manages it ♪
♪ Old Pete will eventually die messing with meat ♪
"Whew........."
Pado Filis quietly slipped into another tunnel, having already searched several rooms but still not found what she was after. It’s unclear whether the thing she wanted was even here, since this bunch of green skins didn’t bother tidying up, and finding the needed item in a room full of disorderly items is no easy task.
Especially when you’re unsure if that thing is even in the room.
"Hahaha!"
Just as Pado Filis was considering where to search next, she suddenly saw several small dwarfish figures running toward her from the other side of the hallway. They looked like little green-skinned dwarfs, and the leading dwarf was jumping joyfully, holding something in its hand.
"Get lost, Big Teeth is going to give this to Big Iron! It’s Big Teeth’s gift!"
"No, it’s mine, you thief!"
The other little dwarfs pursued closely, and Pado Filis, who had read about races before, knew these were called goblins, a kind of orc servant species. But that wasn’t important because Pado Filis saw, among the goblins, the leader was holding high the very Beastman Crown she was searching for!
Should she go for it now?
Seeing the long-desired item finally appear, Pado Filis’s eyes lit up instantly. But seeing those same large steps, advancing orcs around her, she momentarily lacked the courage to rush out forcibly.
But luckily......
"Sister Aili, Sister Eden, I’ve found the thing!"
"Alright, got it, leave it to me!"
As Alicia’s words fell, suddenly, several pink arrows shot out, through the empty window, precisely piercing that goblin’s head. However, before the goblin fell, a magical force cancelled gravity, causing the Crown in its hand to float in the air. Meanwhile, Pado Filis rushed forward at her fastest speed, grabbing the Beastman Crown, then leaping out through the window.
When other orcs and goblins came rushing, nothing remained in front of them besides a dead goblin’s corpse.
"Got it! Sister Aili, quickly call Great Judge to take us back!"
"Alright."
Hearing Pado Filis’s news, Alicia also nodded. Then she contacted Duanmu Huai’s communication terminal.
"Great Judge, we’ve found the Beastman Crown! Ready to retreat?"
However, to Alicia’s surprise, what came from the communication terminal was not the expected agreement to retreat, but a loud yell.
"WAAAAAAGH!!"
"???"
Listening to this yell, Alicia couldn’t help but wear a baffled expression.
What...... happened?
