Free Web NovelChapter 68: 68 | The Forbidden Path
Natasha had cried more in the past half a month than she had in the past two decades combined. ƒreewebɳovel.com
But the tears falling right now were nothing like the ones before. They weren’t quiet or controlled like last night when she buried her face into the pillow and they weren’t caused by wine like the day they fought.
These were the tears of a child who had been holding it in for so long.
Her body curled forward until her forehead pressed against her knees. Her shoulders shook violently and her breathing came out in broken gasps that she tried to muffle with her hands.
’I let him go. I already let him go. So why does it hurt when I see those two together? Why does my heart feel like it’s being crushed?’ She pressed her palms harder against her mouth.
A low, ugly sound escaped her mouth. freeωebnovēl.c૦m
She had never cried like this in her life.
Not when Eden’s Gate put everything on her as a child, not when she was forced into a marriage, and not even when her realm fell apart over twenty years.
Through all of that, she held herself together because someone had to. Because there was always someone who needed her to be strong.
But when she needed someone, nobody was there.
’I did have someone...’ Dante’s face appeared in her mind and everything came flooding back at once.
The cooking, the massage, the fight, the date, the night he slept on her lap, the way he carried her to bed and whispered her name.
’But... only for a very short time.’
Now Dante had Emma.
And she was right back where she started.
Alone.
"Emma." Natasha muttered the name. ’She liked him first. She spent more time with him. She knows him better than I do. So she deserves him the most.’
She paused as an aggrieved look appeared in her eyes. ’But don’t I?’
’My whole life, I’ve been sacrificing things and helping others instead of chasing my own happiness. Don’t I deserve at least one thing for myself?’
What Natasha didn’t know was that she was the one who deserved Dante more than anyone.
She had been with him since the very first day he opened his eyes in this world.
’Every single time.’ Her nails scraped against the floor. ’I gave things away because someone else needed them more than me.’
’And I never once complained.’ Her tears hit the floor one after another, forming a small dark patch.
’But this time I wanted something for MYSELF. For once in my entire life, I wanted something that was just mine. Is that too much to ask?’
She stayed on the floor, crying until her throat was raw and her eyes were swollen and there was nothing left to come out.
"Why does it always have to be me?" She muttered in a broken voice, her head hanging between her knees.
It was then a blue screen flickered to life in front of her, its faint glow lighting up her tear-soaked face in the dark room.
[Tell me.]
[Why does it always have to be you?]
"Go away." She said in a hoarse voice, turning her head away.
[Aren’t you tired of being a pushover?]
"What do you know about me, you stupid bot?!" She turned to look at the screen with anger forming in her eyes. "Can’t you just leave me alone? Do you enjoy tormenting people that much?"
[No. Do you enjoy playing the savior that much? Do you think you don’t deserve happiness because of it?]
"I DIDN’T ASK TO BE ONE!" She screamed, her voice cracking immediately. "It was forced on me. I was never given the chance to be normal."
[Then who is stopping you now? Should I show you?]
The next second, a reflection formed on the blue screen.
It was Natasha herself.
"Me...?" Her eyes widened after seeing her own reflection staring back at her.
[Of course it’s you! You are the reason you’re like this.]
[You own one of the biggest business empires in the world. You are the leader of the oldest awakener organization in existence. You are THE woman who wiped the Kingsleys off the map. AND YOU HAVE A GODDAMN SYSTEM!]
[So tell me, what is actually stopping you from chasing the things you want?]
A trace of confidence and clarity appeared in her eyes after reading the system’s words. But it dimmed almost immediately.
"But she’s my student. I’m practically a mother to her. She liked him first. How can I do that to her?" She asked in a defeated tone.
[Do you think the world is that fair? Are you really this naive? So what if she liked him first?]
[Besides, isn’t Dante your student too? You had no problem falling for him and crying like a baby over him, did you?]
"...Shut up." Natasha buried her face into her knees but the red tips of her ears gave her away.
[I won’t! I can’t stand watching such a stupid host.]
[You found the one person who made your heart skip for the first time in your entire life. He made you laugh harder than you have in a century. And you’re giving him up just because someone else wants him too?]
[You said you wanted to bury your feelings. But answer me honestly.]
[Are you really okay with watching Emma take Dante away from you?]
Those words twisted something inside her chest.
An uncontrollable anger and unwillingness surged through her mind.
Just a single morning of watching them together had broken her down in tears. There was no way she would be okay watching them for the rest of her life.
Natasha was silent for a long time before she spoke as something awakened inside her.
’No.’ The word came from her subconscious, from a side of herself she didn’t even know existed until now. ’No, I’m not okay with that.’
"I am NOT okay with that!" Natasha said through gritted teeth.
"...I want him." She was smiling but there was nothing warm about it. Her eyes had a dangerous glint that wasn’t there a second ago.
"If he’s not with me, he shouldn’t be with anyone."
[Congratulations! You have unlocked a Hidden Route]
[The Forbidden Path]
