Free Web NovelChapter 81: A Chill Down My Spine
DARLINGTON
The infirmary was cold.
Too damn cold!!
It had the kind of cold that seeped into your bones and stayed there. I had been sitting in this chair for hours. Maybe longer. I had lost track of time.
Finnian lay on the bed in front of me. His face was pale. His chest was wrapped in bandages. His breathing was shallow. His eyes were closed. He looked small. Fragile. Nothing like the beast that had torn through the corridor.
I had not slept, eaten or moved.
The door opened. I did not turn around. I did not need to. I knew who it was.
Jayce.
His footsteps were heavy. Deliberate. He walked to the foot of Finnian’s bed. He looked down at our brother. His face was unreadable.
"Still sleeping?" he asked.
"He is healing," I said.
"He looks like a corpse."
"He is not a corpse. He is resting."
Jayce snorted. "Resting. That is one word for it."
I finally turned to look at him. His arms were crossed. His jaw was tight. His eyes were fixed on Finnian’s face.
"Why are you here?" I asked.
"To see if he is dead."
"That is not funny."
"I was not trying to be funny."
I stood. My legs were stiff. My back ached. I walked to the window. The moon was high. The stars were cold.
"He almost killed her," I said.
"Who?"
"Samantha. He almost killed her in the corridor."
Jayce was quiet for a moment. "But he did not."
"He could have. He had her in his grip. His claws were at her throat."
"But he stopped."
"Yes. He stopped."
"Because of her blood."
I turned to face him. "You know about that?"
"I heard the rumors. Everyone has heard the rumors. The beast tasted her blood and calmed down." Jayce walked to the side of Finnian’s bed. He looked down at our brother. "What does that mean?"
"I do not know."
"You do not know?"
"I said I do not know."
Jayce’s eyes narrowed. "You have been sitting here for hours. You have not left his side. You have not slept. You have not eaten. And you do not know?"
"I have been thinking."
"Thinking about what?"
I walked back to my chair. I sat down. I rubbed my face with my hands.
"I have been thinking about Mother," I said.
Jayce went still. "What about her?"
"She was the only one who could calm us. When we were children. When the beast rose. She would hold us. She would sing to us. And the beast would go back to sleep."
Jayce did not say anything.
"Now Samantha has done the same thing," I continued. "She calmed Finnian. With her blood. With her presence. Without even knowing it."
"So what are you saying?"
"I am saying she is like Mother. Or maybe Mother was like her. I do not know."
Jayce was quiet for a long moment. Then he pulled a chair to the other side of Finnian’s bed. He sat down.
"I do not like this," he said.
"Like what?"
"Her. The blood. The way everyone is talking about her."
"She saved Finnian."
"She also caused this mess."
"How did she cause this mess?"
Jayce’s jaw tightened. "She is a distraction. She takes our attention away from everything else. From the curse. From the lizards. From the war that is coming."
"She is not a distraction. She is a person."
"She is a slave."
"She is our mate."
The word hung in the air between us.
Jayce looked away. "We do not know that."
"We do know that. You know that. I know that. Even Finnian knows that. We have been fighting over her since the day she arrived."
"Fighting over her does not make her our mate."
"Wanting her does."
Jayce was silent.
I leaned forward. "Why are you so afraid of admitting it?"
"I am not afraid."
"You are. You always have been. You push people away before they can get close. You act cruel so they will not see that you care."
"You do not know what you are talking about."
"I know you better than anyone. Better than Finnian. Better than Father. I know the real you."
Jayce’s eyes flashed. "Then you know that I do not need anyone. I do not need her. I do not need you. I do not need anyone."
"That is a lie."
"It is the truth."
"It is the lie you tell yourself so you do not have to face the fact that you are terrified of being left behind."
Jayce stood. His chair scraped against the floor. His fists were clenched. His face was red.
"You do not get to talk to me like that," he said. fгeewebnovёl.com
"Then leave."
"I will not."
"Then sit down and listen."
For a moment, I thought he would hit me. I could see it in his eyes. The rage. The pain. The fear.
Then he sat down.
"I am scared," he said. His voice was barely a whisper.
I blinked. "What?"
"I said I am scared. Are you happy now? You wanted me to admit it. There it is. I am scared."
I did not know what to say.
"I have never been scared before," Jayce continued. "Not really. Not like this. But she..." He paused. "She makes me feel things I do not want to feel. Things I cannot control. Things that make me want to run."
"Then do not run."
"It is not that simple."
"It is that simple. You just have to choose."
Jayce looked at me. His eyes were wet. "And what if I choose wrong?"
"Then you try again."
He laughed. It was a bitter sound. "You make everything sound so easy."
"It is not easy. But it is simple."
We were silent for a moment. Then Jayce spoke again.
"Mother would have liked her," he said.
I nodded. "I think so too."
"She would have told us to stop fighting. To share. To be kind to each other."
"She would have been disappointed in us."
"She was always disappointed in us."
"No." I shook my head. "She was not disappointed. She was worried. There is a difference."
Jayce was quiet.
Then Finnian stirred.
His eyes fluttered open. He blinked. He looked around the room. His gaze landed on me. Then on Jayce.
"What are you two doing here?" he asked. His voice was weak.
"Saving you," Jayce said.
Finnian tried to laugh. He winced. "Does not look like you saved anything."
"You are alive," I said. "That is what matters."
Finnian closed his eyes. "Samantha," he whispered. "She calmed me."
Jayce and I exchanged a look.
"We know," I said.
"Her blood... it touched my tongue... and everything went quiet."
Jayce leaned forward. "What do you mean, quiet?"
"The beast. It stopped roaring. It went to sleep. Like it had been put to rest."
I felt a chill run down my spine.
