Free Web Novel* * *
Ji Haebeom lazily swung one polished shoe. Slouched on a worn black leather sofa, he was reviewing the latest revised version of the script.
After reaching the final page, Ji Haebeom finally spoke.
“Director.”
“What.”
“We’re going to need a bigger budget.”
“You trying to turn us into beggars? Forget it.”
“No, seriously. The more I think about it, the more I feel like we need to burn money by the second in this scene.”
Ji Haebeom set the script down on the table and pulled out a cigarette. Behind him, as he exhaled a satisfied stream of smoke, a pale winter rain drifted down outside the window.
“You got that much money?”
“I’m not exactly broke.”
Sitting across from him was Eom Gyun, the pride of the Korean film industry, puffing away at his own cigarette.
Though his words sounded dismissive, the corners of his mouth were curled upward.
Because the highest praise possible had just come from Ji Haebeom—a man who could function as actor, producer, and investor all at once.
That statement about burning production costs by the second.
As if he wouldn’t hesitate for even a moment to create the perfect scene.
“You annoying bastard. Fuck... fine. Dump your entire fortune into it.”
“That’s going a little too far.”
Ji Haebeom tilted his chin upward as if pondering something. The old sofa sank deeper beneath him.
“Come to think of it... I heard Hyeonjo made a pretty decent profit from investing.”
“Where’d he invest? Yun Hyeonjo? In 〈Faster Than the Law〉?”
“I might throw some money into something too and make a little extra. Looking at this now, I kinda want more money for the second half.”
“Cut the bullshit. They call it investing, but it’s basically gambling, damn it. You think this is the first time some idiot actor got carried away?”
Eom Gyun said that while grinding his cigarette out in the ashtray. But judging by his expression, he was genuinely curious.
“So where are you putting it?”
During the Korean content ban, Ji Haebeom had poured money into 〈The Great Garland〉 and made a fortune unlike anything he’d ever seen.
It had become a legendary success story known throughout the industry and even among the general public.
“KBC’s new drama.”
“The new drama...? Who was doing that one again?”
As Director Eom searched his memory, he tapped his cigarette pack thoughtfully. He slid another cigarette out and stuck it between his lips before frowning.
“You idiot. There’s a school-bullying scandal blowing up right now, and nobody even knows if the project’s going to survive. You want to invest in that? You’d be better off going outside and handing cash to random people. At least you’d get a good-news article out of it.”
“But that’d be a waste.”
“Funny hearing that from someone who supposedly knows the value of money. Stop screwing around and keep it safely in your account. This bastard got lucky a few times and now thinks he’s invincible...”
“Well. I made that money thanks to her anyway.”
Ji Haebeom deliberately shrugged in front of Director Eom, who blew smoke right into his face.
It was the truth.
He’d never intended to invest that much into 〈The Great Garland〉 in the first place.
Not unless the situation had looked entertaining.
Since the money had been earned thanks to Han Yeoreum, he figured losing some of it wouldn’t be a big deal.
‘And this time I’ve got a decent excuse, too.’
The project was being made by disciples of Ja Sokhwan, the director behind 〈The Great Garland〉, which had become Ji Haebeom’s signature work. He was also fairly close to KBC’s station director.
That gave him a perfectly reasonable excuse.
If news spread that Ji Haebeom had invested, it would likely convince wavering investors not to pull out.
Director Eom picked up the phone he’d barely touched throughout the meeting.
Apparently he’d decided that looking at his phone would be better than listening to Ji Haebeom’s nonsense.
“Hey. What did I tell you, Haebeom? Use your brain.”
Eom waved the phone.
On the screen was the reason Ji Haebeom absolutely should not invest.
“Ah...”
Ji Haebeom let out a low sigh.
The cigarette in his hand continued burning quietly.
* * *
Eunnyangi could hardly believe what she was seeing.
Even on the packed commuter train from hell after work, she was watching people take cheap shots at Han Yeoreum.
‘What exactly did Han Yeoreum do wrong?’
It was a familiar sight.
As a fan of Eun Baekhap, she had seen this countless times before.
Anyone pointing out that Han Yeoreum had done nothing wrong was being completely ignored.
-Anonymous 151: Why are people worried about and defending celebrities in a situation like this lol. Maid genes are insane.
↳ Anonymous 164: Facts.
↳ Anonymous 178: Seriously what the hell lol. You people keep dragging some unrelated actress into this and when someone points it out, suddenly it’s “maid genes”?
↳ Anonymous 122: How is Han Yeoreum unrelated? She’s basically the number one contributor to rehabilitating a school bully’s image... haha.
↳ Anonymous 204: Anonymous 122, just admit you hate Han Yeoreum. You’ve been posting nonstop all day, fuck’s sake.
↳ Anonymous 225: Male actors have been helping controversial celebrities clean up their images for years, but suddenly now it’s a problem?
Kim Jisang would stay in the entertainment industry just like every other controversial celebrity.
Why?
Because Han Yeoreum’s dramas always succeeded, so this one would too.
‘What kind of bullshit logic is that?’
People were blaming Han Yeoreum for every hypothetical scenario involving Kim Jisang’s successful return.
They even tied her to completely unrelated celebrities and scandals through the most ridiculous mental gymnastics imaginable.
‘Sigh... I really don’t even like Han Yeoreum...’
After binge-watching 〈Dongdaemun Romance〉 all weekend, Eunnyangi decided to take Han Yeoreum’s side.
There were several reasons.
Han Yeoreum wasn’t nearly as good as Eun Baekhap, but she wasn’t a bad actress.
She had publicly expressed respect for Eun Baekhap at an awards ceremony.
And most importantly, Eunnyangi had seen Eun Baekhap go through the exact same thing before.
-This stop is Express Bus Terminal...
That was why she got off the train despite it not being her stop.
Escaping the commuter-train hell, Eunnyangi sat down on a station bench.
Input:
Just hit yourself in the head and repeat three times, “I’m obsessed with men,” okay?
Her fingers flew across the screen.
Then she logged into a Tr*tter account she hadn’t used in ages.
@zP9qL5mNk0
(Han Yeoreum hate-comment screenshots.jpg)
The level of stupidity is honestly insane.
↳ Quote
@zP9qL5mNk0
Funny how your profile picture is a man and yet you randomly attack women lol. Noh Seungchan picked the wrong day. I’m tearing him apart today. Maybe if you spend enough time stanning an actor with dogshit acting, you develop some kind of disease that makes you harass women.
↳ Quote
@zP9qL5mNk0
Oh no... a Noh Seungchan fan whose post-〈Beyond the Closed Door〉 filmography consists entirely of admiring close-ups of his fake nose... Are you trying to target Han Yeoreum because she’s starring in a drama airing at the same time? Poor thing.
↳ Quote
@zP9qL5mNk0
(Screenshot of anonymous personality-exposé post allegedly about Noh Seungchan.jpg)
hehe
Eunnyangi unleashed every skill she had spent years refining.
* * *
IP 85.152 had finally discovered a cultured intellectual amid the anti–Han Yeoreum chaos flooding Tr*tter.
‘Is this person a Han Yeoreum fan?’
For hours, Han Yeoreum had been absorbing not only criticism aimed at herself but even criticism meant for Kim Jisang.
Then suddenly, an angel—
No.
A warrior appeared.
IP 85.152 liked and reposted every post from the account named zP9qL5mNk0.
The sheer sophistication on display left them awestruck.
‘Haaah... What kind of person is this? In this festival of low-intelligence slander, they’re the only one seeing the core of the issue. Ordinary people get distracted by sensational headlines and spend their time emotionally vomiting nonsense all over the internet... but this person is different. The logical consistency of their arguments is genuinely chilling. Guhhh...! They’re not merely redirecting criticism—they’re striking directly at the flawed logic and systemic contradictions of the people treating Han Yeoreum’s suffering like a spectator sport. Damn it—!’
So impressed and moved were they that IP 85.152 completely reverted to their long-buried hardcore-otaku speech patterns.
Still stranded on a bench at Express Bus Terminal Station instead of heading home, IP 85.152 watched zP9qL5mNk0’s rampage.
Not because they were truly a Han Yeoreum fan.
Just because they liked her a little.
* * *
“Will this really work?”
“Cough... It’s Master’s message.... There’s no way... it won’t work... cough cough...”
The dying Galdaeguk desperately believed in the message sent by their master.
[Taesan Bukdu: (photo.jpg)]
[Taesan Bukdu: Set it as your wallpaper and pray.]
[Taesan Bukdu: This talisman got me through the Korean content ban.]
The image was none other than a photo of Ja Sokhwan’s baby, Han Yeoreum.
“Master said... during the greatest trial and hardship of his life... cough... this single photograph carried him through every obstacle...”
The two men’s eyes grew serious as they recalled that era.
The Korean content ban.
A catastrophe and shock unlike anything Korean drama history had ever seen.
If Ja Sokhwan had managed to create a masterpiece even during that period, then his advice carried absolute authority.
“...”
The assistant director stared at them with moist eyes.
The look of someone witnessing people finally lose their minds.
“Come to think of it, during Director Park Jaeyoung’s production too... Shin Seojin got injured, but after setting Baby’s photo as his wallpaper, Ji Haebeom showed up for a cameo and—”
“Wasn’t that just because he’s friends with Shin Seojin?”
“Come over here. Let’s change your wallpaper too.”
“No! I can’t replace Mongsil! Even if the writer says so!”
“You fool! With morale on the floor, are you really going to let a public enemy of the martial world destroy our project?! Cough cough!”
Moments ago, Galdaeguk had barely been able to move.
Now he snatched the assistant director’s phone and replaced the fluffy dog wallpaper with Han Yeoreum.
Then, shortly afterward—
“Huh...”
“This...”
“It worked...?”
The three of them witnessed a miracle science could not explain.
“So, to summarize, Headquarters Director Jegal Rok went into meetings and stopped investors from fleeing. Then he pitched how Han Yeoreum revived Dongdaemun’s business district through 〈Dongdaemun Romance〉 and increased visitor traffic during the holiday season. He promised filming access to any locations investors wanted when production starts in Korea.”
“And 〈The Great Garland〉 is still bringing tourists to Jinhae. I don’t really understand it, but Director Jegal Rok seems convinced Russia’s going to become a tourism route too. So he’s apparently offering investors additional profits through that?”
“Cough cough... On top of that, an anonymous investor who opened his wallet pretty wide during 〈The Great Garland〉 agreed to cover accommodation and venue expenses...”
It was completely absurd.
“And Ji Haebeom joined as an investor too, so even the people thinking about switching over to Noh Seungchan’s side got tied down. This isn’t a dream, right?”
“They’ve already distributed press releases announcing Kim Jisang’s removal. The articles are going out right now. And somehow—I seriously have no idea how—they already found a replacement actor too.”
“Cough cough... Though apparently Ji Haebeom suggested a different actor for the second male lead as a condition of his investment...”
“Oh, another investor who put in even more money than Ji Haebeom blocked that. Said it had to be that specific actor. We thought Ji Haebeom would pull out, but somehow everything worked out.”
The three raised their phones high.
Han Yeoreum’s smiling face shone brightly from each screen.
“A miracle...”
“A genuine miracle...”
“Cough cough... a miracle... cough...”
Everything had been resolved with unbelievable speed.
Less than twenty-four hours had passed.
“But what about our second male lead?”
“I honestly have no idea either. But they say Ma Eungyo’s insane writing skills will somehow make everything work.”
“The decision was just made. Who even said that?”
“I did. Just now.”
Even in the face of this miraculous turnaround, the assistant director and Ma Eungyo couldn’t fully relax.
“Cough cough... We drove away a public enemy of the martial world and brought in a peerless immortal... cough... That alone is enough.... We can’t exactly bring in a bastard who bullies the weak.”
“That’s true, but...”
The problem was that the replacement was basically a male version of Eun Baekhap.
“If he’s an icon of bad luck, that changes things.”
* * *
Born to a father with the surname Jo and a mother with the surname Eun, and given a name that combined both family names.
A handsome man raised entirely on love.
A person who seemed destined to glide through life without difficulty.
Yet somehow, life was never easy for him.
“Fuck. Seriously. Hyung. What exactly are you trying to do with me?”
“Nara, calm down.”
“I can’t calm down. This is complete bullshit. My drama got canceled early less than a year ago, and now what? I’m supposed to be a replacement? Wow. Hyung, you’ve really lost it.”
Jo Eunnara.
Surname Jo.
Given name Eunnara.
A man so good-looking that anyone would agree the country would be a better place if it were filled with people like him.
He possessed a character pure enough to live without ever breaking a law.
But because the world was utterly insane and completely incompatible with a man like him, he had gradually become corrupted.
“I’m not doing it. Not doing it.”
“Nara. Please.”
“No.”
“Stop being ridiculous. This is a real opportunity. Jegal Rok himself said that if you join this project, JC will absolutely back your next one. Absolutely. You know they’ve got connections with NetHolics, right? Let’s get out of here. Go somewhere far away. To a very good country.”
“You’re unbelievably optimistic, hyung. Me? I’m excited to find out what fresh disaster is waiting for me this time. Are people running experiments with my life now?”
“Nara...”
“It’s obviously going to fail. I’ll get cursed out the moment I join. Actually, why do you think JC offered such amazing terms? The answer’s obvious. They’re looking for somebody to use as a human shield while the real lead actor escapes. I’m not doing it.”
Even while throwing a tantrum, his diction remained flawless.
The trajectory of the cushion he hurled carried force.
Even the way he sprawled across the sofa had atmosphere.
Because he was—
“Hey, enough bullshit and start packing. Did I really have to come all the way here because of you? You clueless idiot.”
“Noona, why are you even here? Hyung called you, didn’t he? Why are you sharing my apartment password?”
“Who cares who called me...? Relax your eyes before you get yourself killed.”
He really was a male version of Eun Baekhap.
Because he was actually related to the real Eun Baekhap.
“Director Galdaeguk and Writer Ma Eungyo are offering you a role, and you should be crawling on the floor in gratitude. Why are you acting like such a little shit that I had to come persuade you? Look at this idiot. Acting all proud. I’m already busy enough at the end of the year.”
Jo Eunnara, whose beauty and misfortune both resembled Eun Baekhap’s almost perfectly, took another cushion to the face and still refused to give in.
“AAAGH, FUCK—!!! I SAID NO! NO! NO! I’D RATHER DIE THAN TAKE A REPLACEMENT SUPPORTING ROLE!”
Eun Baekhap picked up another cushion from the sofa.
“Then die.”
It didn’t take long before Jo Eunnara found himself on a flight bound for Russia.
