Free Web Novel“Huh? Doesn’t something look different here?”
“What. It’s the same.”
It was September, not long after the new semester had begun. The college students, out drinking with classmates they had not seen in a while, noticed something unusual at their regular spot.
One of them, about to open the door and head inside, narrowed his eyes for a moment before finally spotting what had changed.
“Hey! Han Taeyang’s noona is here!”
“What? Where, where?”
The words Han Taeyang’s noona instantly threw the area into chaos.
“Here.”
The student with his hand on the doorknob jerked his chin toward the poster, and boos immediately burst out from the excited group.
“Ah, shit—. Are you kidding me?”
“You’re dead.”
Han Yeoreum’s face, holding up a soju glass on a green poster, was plastered right beside the shop door. The classmates who had gotten their hopes up deflated instantly, but still went inside.
“I seriously thought she was actually here.”
“Same. I thought they were filming.”
The students who entered the shop spoke while looking over the menu.
“No way. If she were here, there’s no way Han Taeyang wouldn’t know, right?”
As someone asked while pouring water into a cup, Han Yeoreum’s younger brother, sitting among them, finally spoke.
“Even I don’t know where she is.”
“Huh? ✪ Nоvеlіgһt ✪ (Official version) What? Why?”
“You only don’t get it because you’re an only child. Siblings usually only contact each other for survival check-ins, otherwise there’s not much reason.”
“I don’t even know where my mom’s son is or what he’s doing right now either.”
The blame arrows immediately flew toward the classmate who had first spotted Han Yeoreum’s poster.
“Ah, is that so....”
But that only lasted for a moment.
“She has way too many schedules, so the locations keep changing. Even filming sites get switched around depending on circumstances.”
Han Taeyang finally revealed his true colors.
“I don’t know the actual filming schedule, but tonight at 10 she’s on SBC variety, what was it again, <Audio On Air>. Then tomorrow JTBS’s <After School Quiz Show>, and then....”
The Han Yeoreum schedule he had memorized started pouring out in a stream.
“Right, your sister’s doing a drama right now, isn’t she!”
“I’m watching that too. Unfair Trade!”
But unlike the same high school classmates who used to shut their eyes tight and mourn like college-entrance seniors thinking, here it comes again, this was different. Back then they had been stuck in one classroom hearing about Han Yeoreum nonstop.
Now they were college students.
Since they no longer had to stay glued to Han Taeyang all day, his classmates only heard Han Yeoreum updates in rotation, so their interest had not worn off yet.
“What’s Unfair Trade.”
“You don’t know? I sent you the link last week. This bastard really didn’t watch it.”
“The link... why would you send that...? What exactly are you two?”
“N-no!!! Don’t talk bullshit. I only sent it because Shin Seojin is handsome.”
“Suspicious... huh? Very suspicious.”
At Han Taeyang’s table, the topic naturally shifted to 〈Unfair Trade〉. Some classmates watched every episode live, while others mostly kept up through Intube clips.
Whether they caught the main broadcast or watched reruns, everyone gave the same reaction.
“But it’s seriously so fun. Only two episodes are out so far, but you guys really need to watch it!”
Han Taeyang silently nodded.
“But you know who the culprit is, right? Seriously, just tell us between us.”
“I won’t spoil it anywhere else. Seriously, who’s the killer?”
The classmates did not forget to demand spoilers about the “trash house murder case.” But Han Taeyang shook his head.
“I don’t know. She never lets go of the script in her hands, so even I’ve never seen it.”
“Aaaah... I’m seriously dying to know.”
“But where’s Park Sumin?”
“Didn’t Sumin say she had to head home early today?”
“What’s this, Han Taeyang? Why are you looking for Sumin? Suspicious? You two are suspicious?”
“Hey, hey, hey. Should we order Fresh Leaf Soju?”
In the middle of the loosely drifting conversation, someone brought up Fresh Leaf Soju. They were freshmen who still had not settled on a favorite drink yet. Not a single person suggested ordering something else.
“Boss—! Five bottles of Fresh Leaf Soju for our table—!”
Soon green soju bottles were placed on the table. The bottle printed with Han Yeoreum’s face looked especially clear tonight.
* * *
This was SBC’s Variety Department. Inside the variety conference room, the writers of <Audio On Air> were in the middle of an intense meeting.
“A good candidate for the next guest would be....”
“What about this person?”
“What do they have going on these days?”
As always, while planning the next episode, the writers recalled something they had heard a few days ago.
“No, but honestly, it’s already a lot just having our Variety Director watching us. Thinking even the Drama Director is monitoring this too makes my shoulders feel way too heavy.”
“Exactly. It’s not like variety promotion only means our program.”
“We’re probably the first ones up. That’s why they’re taking it this seriously.”
The news that SBC’s Drama Director was paying excessive attention to the 〈Unfair Trade〉 team’s appearance on <Audio On Air> had spread fast. The writers, thinking over their next casting choices, sighed.
“Our own director already keeps bitching every day asking when we’re finally going to beat <EmBubu>, and now the Drama Director’s making it even more annoying.”
<Please Take Care of Mbonbu>, shortened to <EmBubu>.
They were evil ratings demons.
Back when it was still a pilot program, they had dragged in every writer, PD, staff member, and celebrity connected to M Headquarters, making everyone fantasize about working there. But after becoming a regular show, they were now demonstrating exactly what real promotion looked like.
“Just thinking about Park Sehee’s episode from recently...!”
Even if someone was not currently working at M Headquarters, they could still appear. If they had shown their face even once on any M Headquarters program, simultaneous filming with <EmBubu> was possible.
That made it, quite literally, an open door not just for celebrities with new albums, dramas, or films coming out, but for any celebrity who wanted buzz.
Radio, culture programs, even Intube channels.
“Exactly!”
“Those cheating bastards!”
With <EmBubu>, MBS had made celebrity casting supply unbelievably smooth. Their Intube channel was now soaring with an engine strapped to it thanks to the endless flood of celebrity content.
And after the massive success of the 〈Youth Disqualified!〉 vlog, rumors spread fast that celebrities wanting to test the Intube market were swallowing their pride and approaching first.
Not long ago, the episode featuring unknown theater actress Park Sehee had once again exploded thanks to mukbang, and <Audio On Air>, airing in the same time slot, had quite literally had all attention stolen away.
Everyone wanted to appear on <EmBubu>.
“But this time, we actually have a chance too....”
The eternal number one. That was where <EmBubu> stood now.
“Exactly.”
“Right, right.”
“This time we win!”
But the <Audio On Air> side did not bend, not under the Variety Director’s scolding, nor under the unwanted attention from the Drama Director.
“This episode....”
The single most important thing in variety had always been attention.
“It came out really well!”
The writers did not even bother with a final review of the broadcast cut.
Because they were confident.
* * *
While Han Taeyang’s classmates were fully immersed in their drinking gathering, it was Friday night, 10 PM.
SweetWatermelon, who had gone home early, had memorized every single one of Han Yeoreum’s promotion schedules.
She absolutely could not miss the first batter, <Audio On Air>.
The cheerful, exciting music unique to talk-show variety programs played, the large logo flashed across the screen, and finally, the person SweetWatermelon had been waiting for appeared.
-Hello. Today we’ve invited two of the hottest stars right now! The nation’s favorite second male lead, Shin Seojin, and the nation’s first love, Han Yeoreum.
-Hello—. I’m Shin Seojin.
-Hello! I’m Han Yeoreum!
Watching Han Yeoreum smile brightly as she greeted the audience, SweetWatermelon smiled too.
“Ah, finally. Finally unnie changed her hair and makeup!”
Today, Han Yeoreum had her hair tied high, making her look almost like an idol. Seeing Han Yeoreum in a high-bun style with a calm mint V-neck knit made SweetWatermelon’s heart race.
“So cute....”
SweetWatermelon had originally been a hardcore cosmetics geek. She had simply modified her original nickname, BeautyGeekParkSumin, into her fan café nickname.
Already deciding she would copy Han Yeoreum’s hair and makeup exactly today, she searched with one hand.
[Makeup Q&A / I’m watching On Air right now and Han Yeoreum’s hair and makeup is so fresh T_T]
What do you think she put on her under-eyes? If anyone knows something similar please tell me
-You had the exact same thought as me lol since she’s D model, wouldn’t she be using their products? Looks like a fine-particle highlighter
-Could be opal pearl, or maybe just pink pearl..T_T I want it too seriously
“This is going to sell out like the lip balm all over again.”
SweetWatermelon had felt the hair and makeup in 〈Youth Disqualified!〉 and 〈Unfair Trade〉 had both been a little plain lately, so today’s variety appearance was truly welcome.
“Later I want her to do something like Influencer 1 where the hair and makeup changes dramatically every episode.”
Just imagining that kind of thrilling filmography sent a shiver through her as she focused on the screen. After updates from the two guests, the real promotion for 〈Unfair Trade〉 soon began.
-Both of you were trying for image transformations, right? I mean, what was it, I bet you got a ton of requests to go into romance?
-Romance for the two of us?
-No, no! I just mean, like, didn’t romance scripts start coming in?
When the fixed MC, who always misunderstood what people said, asked back, the colder MC immediately caught it like he had been waiting.
“Yeah... ha... should’ve just done romance instead....”
SweetWatermelon was a face fanatic, so she did not really prefer dramas like 〈Unfair Trade〉 where the styling had limits and unnie had to suffer like crazy.
-Since I still haven’t really done full-on romance yet, I think I’m a little nervous. Once I’m a bit more prepared, for both viewers and fans... I want to greet you with a work that makes it feel like you’ve just fallen in love right away.
The moment she heard Han Yeoreum say that, her heart completely melted.
“Mm... if unnie says so, then that’s how it is....”
Just moments ago she had been firmly on the hardcore rom-com faction, but now SweetWatermelon changed her mind.
Because she believed that if she waited, Han Yeoreum would eventually do a proper romance project someday.
* * *
-Come to think of it, I heard Han Yeoreum has an absolutely incredible special talent?
While Shin Seojin was holding his phone, someone suddenly appeared beside him.
“Sunbae, are you monitoring?”
“Yeah. Want to watch together?”
This was the filming set, where shooting time and standby time were almost the same.
Han Yeoreum dragged a chair over toward Shin Seojin, who was sitting and monitoring <Audio On Air>.
“I was too surprised back then to ask properly, but how much do you practice your lines?”
“For this project?”
Han Yeoreum stared at the phone in Shin Seojin’s hand. She seemed pretty satisfied that she looked especially cute on screen. Instead of looking at the phone, Shin Seojin fixed his gaze on Han Yeoreum sitting beside him. He also did not forget to tilt his right hand slightly to make the angle easier for her to see.
“No. Just in general.”
“When a script comes in, I read it through once with my eyes, then once more out loud.... At some point it just became a habit.”
“All of it?”
“Yes. All of it.”
On the screen, Han Yeoreum was showing off her special skill.
-The red bean porridge next door is red bean fresh-bean porridge, and the soybean porridge next door is new-soy sweet-soy bean porridge, while our house’s sesame porridge is black sesame porridge, but people don’t seem to like eating new-soy sweet-soy bean porridge and sesame porridge. How about sweetly round clean beans, how about picky little beans, little beans, sweet beans, sweet beans?
It was a voice so smooth and precise that just listening to it made it feel like subtitles were appearing in your mind.
“Who made you do that?”
“No.... I just read everything first. Then maybe later, if I get lucky, I might land a role when the chance comes.”
As far as Shin Seojin knew, Han Yeoreum had been a lead actress from the moment she debuted. She had never had an extra phase at all. 〈ParCheHi〉 was also a work Shin Seojin knew well.
‘Even so?’
And yet despite that, Han Yeoreum had always carried herself on set like she was no more than an extra.
So to speak, she did not behave according to her level.
She carried herself exactly like a rookie who had debuted yesterday.
It felt completely ingrained in her body.
-Hey, how do you even do that?
-I’ve heard the soy sauce factory one a lot, but this is my first time hearing this one. Are you the daughter of a porridge shop?
-What kind of boring joke is that.... What do you mean, daughter of a porridge shop?
On <Audio On Air>, the MCs were giving appropriately amused reactions to Han Yeoreum’s special skill. Shin Seojin remembered exactly what came next.
-But I can do this sped up too!
A voice he had never heard before.
-Sped up? Sped up?
-Not slowed down?
-Ooooh. Try it once.
With machine-like precision and speed, Han Yeoreum repeated the same tongue twister she had just done.
This time, the MCs’ reaction was completely different.
-Hey, that’s good!
-Can you go even faster?
-No way. How do you even go faster than this?!
Their exaggerated reactions felt completely genuine.
Even though they were veteran broadcasters who had filmed countless variety shows and were used to every kind of special talent imaginable.
-Then should I try just a little faster?
Han Yeoreum acted unsure, but easily succeeded at triple speed.
Without even taking a breath, she delivered the long sentence perfectly, and the MCs even shot up from their seats in reaction.
A robot CG effect appeared beneath Han Yeoreum’s face.
-Can you do other things fast too? You know, like lines!
-If there’s a line you remember, try saying it. It seriously clears your ears.
-Hey, you two are going to suffer today. One guy’s fingers are going out, and the other’s throat is done for!
The MCs immediately focused entirely on Han Yeoreum.
No matter what they made her say, the reaction was like watching a machine that converted everything into high-definition audio.
Shin Seojin had felt it even while recording with Lee Seohae as Gam Seonghwan, but Han Yeoreum’s delivery was something different.
He could tell there was not even the slightest exaggeration in the MCs’ continuing reactions.
‘The more I watch....’
He was beginning to understand exactly why Han Yeoreum had been the first name brought up for 〈Unfair Trade〉 casting.
“Actor-nim! Let’s match the blocking once!”
Right then, a staff member called for Shin Seojin.
Shin Seojin was about to place the phone into Han Yeoreum’s hand, but then pulled it back instead.
“Come with me.”
“Huh? Isn’t this your solo scene, sunbae? Do I need to come too?”
“No. Just come with me and watch me for a bit.”
“Ha... got it, making camera. I’ll give you a killer admiration reaction again.”
Han Yeoreum rose from her chair.
Shin Seojin quickly caught up to the Han Yeoreum walking ahead.
“Not that kind.”
Shin Seojin brought his thumb and index finger to his jawline. Pressing firmly a couple of times to loosen his mouth, he smiled.
“I kind of want to get a real reaction.”
* * *
[HOT / Today’s Audio On Air MCs looked like they were genuinely amazed.jpg]
(Shin Seojin hand capture.jpg)
Shin Seojin just casually brought finger flicks as his special skill...
(MCs reacting normally.jpg)
The ahjussis had no idea at this point
(all of them staring blankly after each getting flicked in the forehead by Shin Seojin.jpg)
that their heads were about to crack open T_T LMAO
(Shin Seojin cracking walnuts, apples, and smashing watermelons.jpg)
Fuck, if he had done THIS first...
(MC clutching his reddened forehead in rage.jpg)
Give me back my skull I think I got a concussion
(followed by a Han Yeoreum one-shot.jpg)
Still, the next one seems normal enough
(prepared tongue twister.jpg)
Oooh~ nice and normal yep yep she’s good
(MCs listening to 2x speed.jpg)
Huh what is this
(MCs listening to 3x speed.jpg)
??? freēwēbnovel.com
(MCs listening to requested lines at speed.jpg)
She’s insanely good???
(the MCs standing up from their seats with the red marks still on their foreheads.jpg)
forgot the concussion and now they’re hyped
(Shin Seojin and Han Yeoreum’s final goodbye.jpg)
Now that you watched this, go watch 〈Unfair Trade〉 too
If there’s an issue, please correct me gently
-Anonymous 1: Ah today’s was fucking hilarious LOLLL Shin Seojin bulking up is SO my type
-Anonymous 2: He should’ve cracked the walnuts first instead of people’s skulls T_T LOLOLOL
-Anonymous 14: This is fucking hilarious LOLOLOL
-Anonymous 23: Han Yeoreum’s hair and makeup today is insane she’s so damn cute
-Anonymous 42: But wasn’t Shin Seojin originally on the delicate pretty-hands line? Those veins are crazy aah
-Anonymous 49: Back during 〈We Rund〉 they CG-touched out the veins because he had to look like a rich family son
-Anonymous 62: (Shin Seojin hand photo.jpg) So later in the second half they couldn’t keep up the CG and his real hand veins started showing LMAO
-Anonymous 98: Ji Haebeom was a little more on the delicate-hands line than Shin Seojin so I think they did it on purpose, but anyway I like him way better now T_T
This was MBS. Gam Dajeong and the staff of 〈EmBubu〉 were monitoring the humor post that had been uploaded immediately the moment tonight’s episode went up.
“Oh no....”
-Anonymous 101: But seriously what IS Han Yeoreum, she’s not even a line-delivery machine she’s just fucking insane
-Anonymous 112: I already knew her diction was good but I had no idea it was THAT good
-Anonymous 145: The funniest part is everyone’s foreheads are still red while they’re busy admiring Han Yeoreum LMAO
-Anonymous 162: Lately I’ve been so fucking annoyed because actors these days mumble no matter male or female, I wish Han Yeoreum would personally teach them..T_T this is so satisfying
-Anonymous 203: Ha, there’s a reason Geum Bitgang’s favorite doll is Han Yeoreum.. even I’m getting hyped LOLOL
Gam Dajeong scrolled down, biting her lip.
“They... stole the attention....”
At the moment, the variety show getting the biggest reaction in that time slot was Han Yeoreum and Shin Seojin’s <Audio On Air>.
