Free Web NovelChapter 112: Chapter 108: Heart Demon Dispelled, Mind Unblemished
Du Youqian had been a parent himself, so he could understand the maddening, soul-crushing agony of losing a child.
But he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He couldn’t acknowledge the parents from each of his lives.
The self he truly recognized in his heart was named Du Youqian.
The 996 wage slave from Earth, the homebody who loved to binge-watch shows and play games. The Du Youqian who, despite being three parts kind and seven parts disappointed with the world, still strived to live on and treat those around him well.
’Every reincarnation that followed had to be centered on "me."’
’Otherwise, after so many reincarnations, who was I really? Fang Zhongying? Qiu Yuanqing? Or Yu Fei?’
’If my sense of self became confused, I’d probably go insane after a few more reincarnations, long before I ever reached the Nascent Soul realm.’
’If the "I" I recognize is Du Youqian, then who are Fang Zhongying’s parents, Qiu Yuanqing’s parents, and Yu Fei’s parents?’
But if he were to disown them completely, Du Youqian couldn’t deny the eighteen years before he awakened his Past Life Memory in each lifetime. He couldn’t deny the arduous sacrifices and deep, tender love that Fang Zhongying’s parents, Qiu Yuanqing’s parents, and Yu Fei’s parents had shown him. freewёbn૦νeɭ.com
He, too, had once depended on his parents of that era, basking in their endless affection.
That was why he could only flee. He avoided confronting them because he didn’t know how.
That is, until this life, when he faced the trial of True Fire Refining God and the visions that came with it.
It made him realize that he had to resolve this problem properly. Otherwise, it would sooner or later become his Heart Demon.
When the time came for his Core Formation, he would surely fail to pass the trial.
In his visions, he saw Fang Zhongying’s white-haired old father, sighing sorrowfully as he looked through the family genealogy before finally taking a brush to blot out a name. He saw the perpetually melancholic old mother, secretly weeping.
He saw Qiu Yuanqing’s parents. Despite their wealth, prestige, flourishing family, and halls full of descendants, they would still sigh when sitting together, wondering if they had done something wrong to make their beloved son leave them, their hearts unable to find peace.
And then there were Yu Fei’s parents...
Yu Fei’s parents were an ordinary couple from the outskirts of the Capital City. Generations of diligence and frugality had allowed them to slowly acquire land and build a respectable family fortune.
In their village, they were considered minor, well-known landowners.
After having a son late in life, they poured all their hopes and efforts into him.
So, after their only son secretly ran away to seek immortality and the Dao, the old couple’s Essence, Qi, and Spirit rapidly collapsed.
It was as if they had lost their souls; they couldn’t muster the energy for anything.
As for the other villagers, those with a conscience still sympathized with the old couple.
But the unscrupulous ones, seeing that the family no longer had a young man, began to taunt and mock them, launching overt and covert attacks, blackmailing and extorting them. Some young thugs even secretly plotted to murder the old couple and squander their life savings.
A perfectly fine family, brought to the brink of collapse simply because one person was missing.
All of the above was what Du Youqian had seen in his visions during the True Fire Refining God trial.
It wasn’t necessarily the truth.
However, it was a reasonable assumption, and the probability of such a situation occurring in reality was indeed quite high.
The Flying Boat was still circling.
Du Youqian’s mind was a thicket of distracting thoughts.
Not only did memories of his time as the young Yu Fei surface, but he even recalled stories from his days as the young Qiu Yuanqing and the young Fang Zhongying.
He had thought those faded old photographs had long since molded over and weathered away in the attic of his memory, never to be found again.
But he never expected that, upon unearthing them by chance, they would be so clear. The smiling faces in the photos moved Du Youqian, yet also filled him with melancholy.
’There’s nothing wrong with centering myself on "me," but even though "I" am Du Youqian, does that mean Fang Zhongying, Qiu Yuanqing, and Yu Fei are not me?’
’They are all just changes in my identity during different periods, not different people.’
’To deny Fang Zhongying, Qiu Yuanqing, and Yu Fei is to deny myself!’
He remembered what he had declared in each life upon breaking through the Mystery of the Womb and awakening his Past Life Memory.
"I am Yu Fei, and also Qiu Yuanqing, and also Fang Zhongying. I am... Du Youqian."
’The reverse is also true,’ he thought. ’I am Du Youqian, and at the same time, I am also Fang Zhongying, also Qiu Yuanqing, and still Yu Fei.’
’From now on, I can no longer treat the family of each lifetime so heartlessly.’
’Although I can’t be like an ordinary person, staying by my parents’ side and making them happy, I also can’t just cut them off so cruelly and never contact them again.’
’I need to find a way to handle this properly.’
’At the very least, I must ensure the parents of each life no longer suffer such pain and torment.’
Fang Zhongying’s parents had long since turned to dust, so it was impossible to make amends.
But Qiu Yuanqing’s parents should still be alive. He could try to make it up to them in some small way, at least to give the old couple some peace of mind.
As for Yu Fei’s parents, he could go and make proper arrangements for them right now to avoid leaving any regrets.
At this thought, Du Youqian activated the Flying Boat’s Blinding Array and slowly descended, landing a short distance from the village.
He then put away the Flying Boat and revealed himself.
He had just taken a step when he looked down at his clothes and stopped again.
He took a set of ordinary-looking robes from his Storage Treasure Pouch, put them on, and only then continued toward the village.
Along the way, everyone who saw him showed a look of astonishment.
’Isn’t that the Yu Family’s boy, the one who’s been missing for years? He’s finally back?’
A few of the ruffians who had bullied the elderly Yu couple saw Du Youqian, their eyes glinting menacingly, though it was unclear what they were plotting.
Du Youqian, of course, couldn’t be bothered to guess. He would simply deal with all of them tonight; why should he care what they were thinking?
Finally, Du Youqian arrived in front of his home in this lifetime.
A stooped and aged woman, dressed in worn clothes with several holes, was tending to the vegetable trellis in the courtyard. freeωebnovēl.c૦m
Her movements were shaky, and she was clearly distracted, making several mistakes.
Du Youqian watched for a long moment before speaking softly, "Mother..."
The old woman looked up and froze. Her withered lips parted, but no sound came out. Her breathing only grew heavier and more rapid.
After staring at Du Youqian for a long while, she lowered her head and rubbed her cloudy eyes forcefully. When she raised her white-haired head again, she found that the image of her beloved son was still reflected in her pupils.
Two streams of tears finally slid silently down her wrinkled face.
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「Several days later」
As Du Youqian once again stepped onto his Flying Boat and sped toward the Holy Blood Sect, he felt as if an invisible, fine veil had been lifted from his heart.
His mind felt clearer, more immaculate.
Even his Flying Sword Manipulation felt a bit more agile than before.
’My line of thinking must be correct.’
’If I can make proper arrangements for my family in each future life, at least I won’t develop a Heart Demon over this issue.’
He had stayed at home for a few days, doing his best to play the part of a filial son and talk with his elderly parents.
He promised that once he finished a small task, he would bring them to an "Immortal Realm"—that is, a Blessed Land.
Of course, he wouldn’t bring his parents to the Holy Blood Sect’s Blessed Land.
Instead, he planned to send them to a Blessed Land governed by one of the Profound Sects’ Orthodox Sects, allowing them to live out their days in peace and comfort.
Although he couldn’t always be by their side, he would buy some lively and clever maids and servants to accompany his parents. He would even find one or two kind and talkative children to become their adopted children, to dote on and keep them from being lonely.
Perhaps much later, when his Realm was higher, he could refine an Outer Body Incarnation or use something like Puppetry Art to fulfill his filial duties in his stead.
But for now, it was truly difficult to pursue the Dao and fulfill his filial duties at the same time.
He could only prioritize pursuing the Dao and then treat his parents as well as he could. ’I can’t achieve perfection,’ he thought, ’but I can at least do everything within my power.’
At this thought, Du Youqian halted his distracting thoughts.
He began to adjust himself to face the inevitable battles that lay ahead.
