Free Web NovelIt was afternoon, and the sun was just right. Behind Da Chunyang Palace, by the Cold Pool.
Lu Yibei and Hua Sang lay side by side on two large rocks, while Shui Shu Beast lay on its side with its belly up. From a distance, they looked like three salted fish drying in the sun.
Although Lu Yibei often dealt with rotten, bloody, and filthy things, and spent her days fiddling with "dirty things" like calamity water, she was initially reluctant to lie on the rocks by the Cold Pool with Hua Sang.
How could the clean, fragrant, and soft Calamity Miss take a nap on dirty rocks, just like the unkempt Turtle Girl and the sloppy Shui Shu Beast?
But
After trying it once, the Calamity Miss found it truly enjoyable.
The rocks, warmed by the sun, were covered with dried moss that had become fluffy like palm fibers, and they weren't uncomfortable. The feeling was like freshly fried, not yet completely cooled pork floss, with a fair body lying on top like silky smooth light cream.
As soon as this thought flashed through her mind, Lu Yibei seemed to receive a shock. She suddenly opened her eyes, sat up, rubbed her slightly throbbing temples, and sighed silently.
Damn it! I'm really going crazy from trying to learn how to cook. If this continues, I'm bound to lose my mind!
Lu Yibei originally thought that with her above-average cooking skills and Qingji's guidance, she would soon be able to cook true "Human Fireworks."
For this, she worked hard for a whole week.
However, after all her efforts, she realized that she had still underestimated the picky taste of the Xuan Turtle that could carry mountains. That Xuan Turtle, as the left and right arm of Da Chunyang Palace's Ancestor and a great urban legend comparable to the Elder Sister's mother, did not make the core of its urban legend body, hidden deep in Da Chunyang Palace's Cold Pool upon its demise, easy to obtain.
A week passed, and Lu Yibei cooked dozens of different dishes, from main courses to desserts, simple, complex, expensive, and affordable, but not one was successful, leaving her greatly discouraged.
At this time, Fu Xinyi, who had already begun devilish training according to Disaster-level standards and had not rested for a moment for a week, became particularly crucial.
Thus, she became a strong spiritual pillar for Lu Yibei to persevere. After all, Fu Xinyi was truly miserable.
Lu Yibei felt that Jixiazi and Zhang Huainan, that Old man, didn't treat her like a person.
No, even ordinary high-level urban legend probably couldn't last long under that level of training! People are often like this; when they see someone more miserable than themselves, they feel like they aren't so miserable anymore. It's like a 996 worker, tired as a dog, secretly rejoicing when looking at a 007 worker who is worse than a dog.
---
The float sank, and Hua Sang suddenly lifted the fishing rod in her hand. With a "splash!", the Cold Pool surface broke, and splashing water drew a shallow rainbow in the air.
A large, completely black turtle, pulled by a red thread, smashed through the rainbow and landed in the weeds by the Cold Pool. It bounced twice, lay on its back with its limbs up, struggled for a bit, then tilted its head and stopped moving.
Hua Sang got up, walked forward, poked the large turtle with a branch, examined it for a while, then looked at Lu Yibei, shook her head with pursed lips.
"Still not working?" Lu Yibei asked with a frown.
Hua Sang shook her head, looked at the large turtle on the ground, and said, "No, besides being a bit black, there's nothing special." After she finished speaking, Shui Shu Beast, who had moved closer to Hua Sang and was watching the large turtle with her, also nodded.
This kind of thing can only be used as a ball to kick.
"Tsk!" Lu Yibei clicked her tongue, held her forehead with one hand, and slumped back onto the rock, gazing at the azure sky. She mumbled, "Turtle Girl..."
Hua Sang retrieved the large turtle from Shui Shu Beast's mouth, which had almost been carried off as a ball. She looked at Lu Yibei, tilted her head, and said, "Hmm?" "I think I might have to go back to Hua City first..." Lu Yibei said.
Hua Sang shrugged, saying seemingly indifferently, "Oh, no big deal." She had long been prepared for failure. She had always been quite relaxed about fishing for turtles by the Cold Pool. If luck wasn't on her side and she couldn't catch one in the end, she wouldn't be too disappointed.
What's more, the accumulated Night Erosion in her body had been almost completely cleared. As for the master's marriage proposal or whatever in another ten or eight years, she cared even less. If Lu Yibei really wanted to marry her, she would always be here, and he could come whenever he wanted.
If Lu Yibei didn't have that intention, it would be useless to force the matter.
When she was in Jinhua Village, she had already witnessed the married life of the son of Old Six at the end of the village and his wife, who were betrothed before birth and forced together, fighting every three days and hitting each other every five.
Just thinking about it made her feel physically and mentally exhausted.
Matters of the heart were like the many secret techniques of Da Chunyang Palace; the more you tried to grasp them, the less you could, so you had to let them take their natural course. Lu Yibei sat up, looked at Hua Sang, and explained, "Uh, don't misunderstand, I'm not not helping you."
She was actually quite persistent about this matter.
She had few friends, and Hua Sang was one. Even without Zhang Huainan's kind reminder, and without that damn marriage proposal, she still hoped to help Hua Sang.
"Is there an urgent matter in Hua City?" Hua Sang asked.
"Not entirely!" Lu Yibei pursed her lips, "Although part of the reason is that something went wrong at the university."
The 1:1 replication of Paper Cicada Immortal, which successfully fooled everyone for ten days, still went wrong in the end. Listening to Professor Ma's voice on the phone, trembling as if electrocuted,
Lu Yibei felt it was necessary for her to go back and deal with it.
But the main reason is that I only discovered last night that a certain hundred-year-old man doesn't know how to cook true Human Fireworks at all, yet he still tried to teach me!"
Yes, Qingji didn't know how to cook true Human Fireworks at all. He had hidden it from Lu Yibei for a whole week and only revealed the truth last night under Lu Yibei's interrogation.
In fact, Lu Yibei came to find Hua Sang today to accompany her fishing for turtles with a glimmer of hope. She planned to make one last attempt using the dishes she learned last night.
Although the chances were slim, what if?
---
Last night, inside the kitchen of Yanzhi Tavern.
Qingji stood by the stove, his cleaver rising and falling in his hand. While demonstrating his exquisite knife skills to Lu Yibei, slicing a green pepper into fine shreds with less than a millimeter difference in size, he chattered away.
"Lu Yibei, do you know? There are no limits to delicious food. In this world, there is no 'most delicious,' only 'more delicious'! As long as you put your heart into it..."
"As long as you put your heart into it, everyone is a God of Cookery?" Lu Yibei interrupted, "But I've also heard that there is no God of Cookery in this world, or rather, everyone is a God of Cookery."
Qingji glanced sideways at Lu Yibei, who was sitting on a small stool, propping her chin with her hands, her cheeks flushed by the firelight from the stove like a delicate flower. He frowned and said, "Stop talking nonsense here!"
"Did you see the knife technique clearly just now? Hurry, come over and try it!"
Lu Yibei remained unmoved, sighing silently. She said, "Ancestor, you taught me this knife technique on the first day. You haven't forgotten, have you?"
"Really?" Qingji frowned, "You must have misremembered?"
"How could that be! You know my memory, don't you?" Lu Yibei said seriously, "I remember clearly that for every hundred grams of green pepper, you make thirty-six cuts, each spaced 2.5 millimeters apart."
"This..." Qingji's mouth twitched slightly, and he said awkwardly, "Damn it, wasn't I just thinking of letting you review and learn something new? Since you still remember, then..."
Lu Yibei glanced sideways at Qingji and interrupted, "Ancestor, you actually can't make the so-called Human Fireworks at all, can you?"
After speaking, she immediately activated Lingtai Pure Karma, letting thick armor completely encase her body. The next words were likely to make the Ancestor furious and lash out, so she had to be prepared! Lu Yibei thought.
It was unclear whether he was really stumped by Lu Yibei's question or if he was unhappy seeing her turn into that iron turtle-like appearance again. Qingji's expression froze for a moment, but he quickly recovered.
"Nonsense, how could I not know how? Are you doubting my ability?"
"But I've made dozens of dishes according to your guidance, and they were completely useless," Lu Yibei said expressionlessly.
Dozens of consecutive failures made her body exude a desperate aura of "rotten and smelly" like a salted fish. She couldn't help but start to suspect that there was a problem with Qingji's teaching, rather than a problem with her learning.
Immediately after, seeing that Qingji was about to speak, she snatched the conversation back and said, "Are you trying to say that the lack of success is because I wasn't diligent enough?"
Qingji stiffened his neck, glanced sideways at Lu Yibei, and said loudly, "Do you think you were very diligent?!"
Lu Yibei did not answer Qingji's question. Instead, she stared at him in silence for a few seconds, then changed the subject. She said, "Ancestor, tell me honestly, have you ever personally made the so-called Human Fireworks? If you have, why are the dishes you teach me different every time?"
"And they're all from the Yanzhi Tavern menu," Lu Yibei added silently in her heart.
She had memorized the menu of Lus Sichuan Cuisine Restaurant since she was very young. These past few days, frequenting Yanzhi Tavern, she had also memorized the wooden plaques carved with dish names hanging in the hall. After careful comparison, she realized that all the dishes Qingji taught her were within the scope of these two menus.
Was this cultivating a non-material cultural heritage inheritor for Yanzhi Tavern, or teaching how to make "Human Fireworks"?
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"It's right that it's different! Do you know that Human Fireworks originally doesn't refer to a specific dish, but rather..." Qingji was halfway through speaking when Lu Yibei interrupted, "He's getting anxious, he's getting anxious!"
"Ancestor, I'm asking you, have you ever made real Human Fireworks? Don't try to change the subject!"
"Look at me, look at the blood of my great-great-grandmother flowing in my body, and tell me the truth! Don't lie, my great-great-grandmother's spirit in heaven is watching!"
Damn it! I shouldn't have told this girl about that past event in the first place. Now it's almost a handle in her hand, constantly brought up. Qingji glared fiercely at Lu Yibei, straightened his back, turned his head, slightly lifted his chin, and said with a hint of arrogance in his brows, "No!"
After speaking, he glanced at Lu Yibei's "tin skin" again, gritting his teeth fiercely. If it were before, he would have taught Lu Yibei a lesson long ago, but now...
What a sin!
Lu Yibei, "???"
No? Then what the heck are you being so righteously proud of there?
"Although not... but..." Qingji looked at Lu Yibei and said solemnly, "The key to fishing up the core body of that old bastard's urban legend is Human Fireworks. It's something this old man researched from ancient texts."
"When it comes to cooking skills, looking at the whole world, those better than this old man probably won't exceed the number of fingers on two hands."
"After saying so much, haven't you still never made real Human Fireworks? Everything is still just in the theoretical and hypothetical stage, isn't it?" Lu Yibei pouted.
"You're too unreliable! This is like teaching me 1+1=2 and then wanting me to prove 1+1=2." "What nonsense? Does 1+1=2 still need to be proven?" Qingji looked puzzled.
"It's a classic math problem, don't worry about it..." Lu Yibei shrugged her shoulders, which were made extra bulky by the armor she wore, "In short, what I want to say is, this matter is very outrageous."
"Hmph!" Qingji snorted coldly, "How can this be called outrageous? If this old man can't teach you, then no one in this world can."
"Ancestor, don't speak so absolutely!" Lu Yibei stood up and interrupted.
As she spoke, her eyes, visible through the slit in her helmet, winked and blinked at Qingji.
"Didn't you just say that those whose cooking skills surpass yours in the whole world don't exceed the number of fingers on two hands? That is ◆ Nоvеlіgһt ◆ (Only on Nоvеlіgһt) to say, conservatively estimated, there are still nine people better than you, right?"
"Then why don't you just tell me who those nine people are, and I'll go to them..." Lu Yibei said sarcastically, "Wait, you old man, you didn't just make up that thing about the number of people whose cooking skills are better than yours not exceeding the number of fingers on two hands just to make yourself look good, and you actually have no idea, did you?"
"No way? No way?"
As her words fell, a sound of tearing air erupted, and a kitchen knife shot out from Qingji's hand, transforming into a long sword in mid-air, trailing a silver-white tail flame.
"Clang—!"
Failed to penetrate armor.jpg
Hua Sang held the pitch-black large Xuan Turtle, dodging left and right as if playing rugby, evading the Shui Shu Beast that was trying to snatch the Xuan Turtle from her hand, and then suddenly threw it towards the Cold Pool.
The Shui Shu Beast chased the trajectory of the large Xuan Turtle across the air, leaped up, bit onto the hard turtle shell, and then with a "splash!" plunged into the Cold Pool, splashing up large amounts of water.
Hua Sang dodged the splashing water, looked at Lu Yibei, and said, "So, did Senior Qingji finally tell you where you can learn more advanced cooking skills?"
"He did," Lu Yibei pouted slightly.
I exchanged my life for it, he added silently in his heart.
Last night, after Qingji finally picked up his long sword in a fit of rage and slashed at him for five minutes, she deliberately exposed a weakness, allowing Qingji to find an extremely small gap in her armor and successfully complete the kill.
At that moment, Lu Yibei saw a satisfied smile on Qingji's face.
That smile reminded Lu Yibei of the smile he had when he wasn't expressionless, after enduring over a dozen hours of struggle and finally defeating the final boss in a game.
Then, Qingji pointed out a clear path for her.
So, old people are like children, they need to be coaxed. Simply relying on provocation might not be effective. "Where?" Hua Sang asked.
"Liao Zhai Tavern."
"Hmm?" Hua Sang slightly furrowed her brow. fгeewёbnoѵel.cσm
Noticing her subtle expression, Lu Yibei pressed on, "Have you been there?"
"I've heard of it, but I haven't been." Hua Sang shook her head, "It's said that as long as certain conditions are met, that tavern will randomly appear before customers who need it, but I don't know the specific conditions."
"Oh, I see." Lu Yibei nodded thoughtfully, then patted Hua Sang's shoulder and said, "It's okay, after I go down the mountain, I'll definitely find that tavern, learn cooking, and come back to make you a real Human Fireworks!"
"If you really can't learn it, then forget it. I actually don't mind," Hua Sang said indifferently.
Why must you go find that troublesome tavern?
Don't you feel exhausted?
According to legend, the owner of that Liao Zhai Tavern is not an easy person to deal with.
Hua Sang felt that as long as Lu Yibei had time, she could just come to Da Chunyang Palace and help her absorb a bit. Anyway, running back and forth, it wasn't her who was getting tired. "I know this without you telling me."
If it's really too much trouble, I'll definitely run faster than you.
Lu Yibei said, standing up, her Coat slightly wriggled, shaking off the dust it had accumulated. "Shall we leave it at this? If there's nothing else, I'll be heading off?"
Hua Sang tilted her head, "Then when are you going down the mountain? If the time isn't convenient, I won't see you off."
During this time, she had seen that Lu Yibei was used to being active at night and sleeping during the day. If Lu Yibei left in the middle of the night, someone like her, who went to bed early and woke up late, would absolutely not get up in the middle of the night to see someone off.
Not even the King of Heaven could make me!
"Tomorrow morning," Lu Yibei thought for a moment and said, "You don't need to see me off. Come earlier tomorrow morning, and I'll try making another dish for you. I'll bring it to you tomorrow morning, and you can try it again."
After speaking, he seemed to remember something and muttered to himself, "Oh right, before I leave, I still need to show my face to that Old man Zhang Huainan."
Hua Sang nodded and replied, "Okay, then I'll try my best to get up."
Hearing this, Lu Yibei slightly pouted, turned around, waved her hand with her back to Hua Sang, and walked along the mountain path towards the Lan Yue Cave deep in the back mountain.
Hua Sang watched Lu Yibei walk away, then slowly lay back down on the stone.
"Splash!"
Accompanied by a violent splash, the Shui Shu Beast leaped out of the Cold Pool, holding a fiercely struggling large Xuan Turtle in its mouth. Judging by its size and markings, it was clearly not the one Hua Sang had just thrown back.
The Shui Shu Beast, holding the large Xuan Turtle, looked around for a while, then looked at Hua Sang and let out a muffled snort. "Pfft!"
A snorting sound came from beside her ear. Hua Sang turned her head to look at the Shui Shu Beast, which was giving her a questioning look, and said indifferently, "Looking for Lu Yibei?
He's already gone."
After speaking, she slightly furrowed her brow, closed her eyes, and sighed silently.
She clearly didn't mind at all, but when Lu Yibei really left, and the incessant, peace-disturbing sound was gone from her ears, her heart, which had been as still as stagnant water, rippled slightly.
Just then, the Shui Shu Beast suddenly darted past her, stirring up a strong wind. The Shui Shu Beast told Hua Sang with its actions—Gone? Then wouldn't it be fine to chase after her? But...
Hua Sang raised a hand, covering her eyes with her arm, and murmured, "But... that's so tiring." Lemmm, according to the original plan, after the Da Chunyang Palace arc ends, the Desert Sea arc should follow.
But, while writing the outline for the arcs these past two days, I found that the Da Chunyang Palace arc still has many plot points left unresolved. If I directly write the Desert Sea arc, some content will be difficult to present, and it might turn into digging holes without filling them.
Additionally, Bei Bei has gained many things that she hasn't digested yet, and there isn't a good reason for her to go to the Desert Sea (of course, going forcibly isn't impossible, but I don't think it's very good)-
After thinking about it, I decided to write a slightly shorter arc between the two arcs to bridge them. (Of course, it will also advance the main plot, it's not just padding!)
