Free Web NovelThat morning, as usual, three sets of tableware had been set neatly on the four-seat dining table. Jeongju, busy preparing breakfast, finished the table by placing an earthenware bowl of steamed eggs in the center.
“Jaegyeom. Mesani. Let’s eat.”
At Jeongju’s call, Jaegyeom, who had been lying in bed, sat up in a daze. He took his seat at the table still half-asleep, his head starting to bob. Mesan, who had been out in the yard, came running in as well.
“My lord, did you sleep well?”
“Mm... yeah...”
The table where their family of three sat together was as peaceful as always.
“Thank you for the meal.”
After mumbling the words, Jaegyeom slowly lifted his spoon. He was about to take a sip of soup with his eyes barely open when a sharp sting inside his mouth made his brows knit. Across the table, Jeongju looked puzzled.
“What’s wrong? Is it too salty?”
That was the moment his sleep-fogged mind abruptly cleared.
“...”
Jaegyeom said nothing for a moment. Meanwhile, Mesan, eating soup with a child-sized spoon, answered brightly, “No? It’s not salty at all.”
“Jaegyeom? Is something wrong?”
“Huh? Oh, no. It’s good.”
Jaegyeom blurted the words out in a hurry. He should have told the truth—that nothing was wrong with the soup and that the sore spot in his mouth had simply hurt. But he could not bring himself to open his mouth.
Last night, Jaegyeom had run and run through the streets of Jongno without any destination in mind. He ran until he was out of breath, until the world spun around him. Only when he could not run another step did he finally stop. Since he had been running blindly wherever his feet carried him, without knowing Seoul’s geography in the first place, he had gotten himself lost long before then.
Just then, he spotted a taxi passing down the empty road and immediately hailed it. Even in that daze, he had made a surprisingly wise choice. He had never imagined that the experience of taking a taxi with a drunk Yoon Taehee the day before would come in so useful. The moment the taxi stopped in front of him, Jaegyeom gasped for breath and flung open the rear door as if something were chasing him.
The taxi driver was startled.
“W-what’s going on! Are you all right? Should I take you to the police station?”
With his face drenched in sweat and smeared with dirt, panting as though he might collapse at any moment, Jaegyeom looked like someone in real danger.
But the destination the passenger gave him was not the police station.
“Jaegyeom, I thought you weren’t coming home today?”
At the time, Jeongju, who had put Mesan to sleep and stayed up watching TV until dawn, had been startled by Jaegyeom’s unexpected return. Part of it was relief at seeing him, and part of it was because Jaegyeom looked like an absolute wreck. Where on earth had he gone, and what had he done to himself?
“What—why do you look like that?!”
“I fell. Yeah, I fell.”
After throwing out a rough excuse, Jaegyeom had fallen asleep as if he had passed out. Maybe because the tension had finally released and exhaustion had overtaken him, but when things became complicated, sleeping was the best solution. Sure enough, after waking from that short sleep, Jaegyeom was noticeably calmer than he had been the day before.
The storm that had raged through his mind had already settled. The painful feelings he had toward Jeongju and Mesan had been swept away by the kiss that struck him like a tidal wave, and before he knew it, they had evaporated and drifted somewhere far away. Whether that was fortunate or unfortunate, it allowed him to face the two of them with his usual attitude.
But still...
Jaegyeom, who had been absentmindedly lifting his spoon, let the food slip from it. fɾeewebnoveℓ.co๓
“Pass me some socks.”
“What?”
“Socks.”
“Where are the socks?”
When socks suddenly came up in the middle of breakfast, Jeongju started looking around, baffled.
“Oh, no... Tissue. Give me a tissue.”
Jaegyeom began talking nonsense and corrected himself.
“...”
“...”
Jeongju blinked silently a few times, then said,
“Mesani. Go bring a bowl of cold water.”
“Yeess?”
“Go splash it on your lord’s face so he’ll come to his senses.”
It was a prescription that could clear a person’s head in an instant. Cold water was perfect for someone whose screws had come loose. Seeing that Mesan was really about to go get water, Jaegyeom quickly intervened.
“I think I’m still half-asleep, that’s all... I misspoke.”
It was just a slip of the tongue. Jaegyeom muttered the excuse and half rose from his seat. He pulled out a tissue himself and wiped the table while Jeongju narrowed his eyes at him.
“What are you looking at? Just eat.”
After snapping lightly at him, Jaegyeom immediately lowered his gaze. He poured rice into his soybean paste soup. Jeongju was sometimes difficult to handle because he caught on too quickly.
“Why are you so dazed today? It’s strange.”
“I’m just sleepy. What’s strange about—”
He stopped in the middle of his retort and closed his mouth.
I find you strange too.
Because a voice lingered in his mind like a dream.
“...”
It was exactly as Jeongju said. Though Jaegyeom looked much calmer after a night had passed, he was still confused. He seemed calm and composed on the outside, but inside, he was so distracted and dizzy he could barely think. Where the storm had receded, a typhoon had arrived. And Jaegyeom was now standing in the eye of it.
It was the first kiss of his entire life. The act itself had been shocking, but what shocked him even more was that the other person had been Yoon Taehee. Not only had he kissed another man, but the man he had kissed was Yoon Taehee. In Jaegyeom’s mind, that caused an enormous shock on the scale of the creation of heaven and earth.
Wasn’t kissing something that was, and always had been, done between a man and a woman—especially between lovers? But two men kissing each other? He could say with certainty that such a thing could not happen and should not happen... or so Jaegyeom had always thought.
Of course, there had always been secret cases of men being intimate with other men. Having lived as long as he had, how could he not know that? He did not know what it was called these days, but in the past, it had been called sodomy. Once, when he was wandering from place to place, he had heard that the county magistrate of some town had been dismissed for sodomy and corruption, and that there were quite a few cases of eunuchs in the palace having liaisons with one another. There had also been rumors that a certain tavern was a gathering place for men like that, so people avoided passing by it. In any case, the point was that it had always been someone else’s business.
Never in his life had he dreamed he would touch lips with a man himself. Of course, he knew the world had changed a great deal. It was an age where money alone could earn a person treatment like royalty. But no matter how much the world had changed, there were still principles that did not change. Even in dramas packed with fiction, he had only ever seen men and women kiss, never men with men.
Could Yoon Taehee possibly be a sodomite...
Jaegyeom’s expression grew very grave. Well, Yoon Taehee was such a strange bastard that it did seem possible he might engage in sodomy. But if that was why he had kissed Jaegyeom, did that mean Yoon Taehee had some special feelings for him? It simply did not fit. They fought and hit each other all the time, didn’t they?
Why on earth did Yoon Taehee kiss me...
“Oh, right! Jaegyeom, did you know I got a call from Director Kwon Suncheol yesterday?”
Just then, Jeongju stopped eating and began talking in an excited voice.
“Wow, you know that feeling where you’re on the phone and you’re shaking because you can’t tell if it’s a dream or real life? The power in her voice is no joke. She said filming could start as early as next month, so she wants to meet and discuss the details. We’re meeting this Friday.”
Jeongju had unintentionally been living a semi-unemployed life after going into hiding. The reason he kept making this and that for every meal was, in truth, because he had nothing else to do. Now his face was bright with excitement at the possibility that his comeback might come much sooner than expected.
“I see. That’s good.”
Jeongju chattered happily in a subdued voice, but to Jaegyeom, whose mind was occupied by other worries, it all went in one ear and out the other. Jeongju was noisy, his own mind was chaotic, his heart was complicated, and he could not tell whether the food was going into his mouth or his nose.
He forced himself to chew the rice, but he could not taste it. Worse, his mouth, which he had used all his life only for eating and speaking, now felt unfamiliar. The sensation of rice rolling over his tongue felt strange, as though yesterday’s experience still lingered there.
In the end, Jaegyeom put down his spoon.
“Hey. You know...”
Jaegyeom took a sip of water.
“Um. What do they call it these days?”
“Huh? Call what?”
“When you touch... touch lips.”
It was a question he tossed out in passing to distract himself. Jeongju blinked a couple of times.
“Huh? Touch lips?”
Jeongju thought for a moment, then said, “Ah,” and answered with a bright expression.
“Lip balm?”
Jaegyeom shook his head.
“Ah... lip balm...”
Lip balm? So Yoon Taehee had lip-balmed him? The more he thought about the words, the more uncertain Jaegyeom’s expression became. Something about that did not seem right. It was a phrase he had heard several times on television, but only the vague meaning remained in his head. It was not that refined. It was much simpler, sharper, with more snap to it.
“No, not that.”
“No? Hmm... lip care?”
“What’s that supposed to be? No.”
“What, then? Lipstick?”
As Jeongju kept guessing wrong, Jaegyeom grew more and more frustrated.
“No, damn it, not that! You know. It shows up in TV dramas sometimes! When a man and a woman grab each other’s faces, and their lips, and do that damn thing!”
Annoyed that he had to ❖ Nоvеl𝚒ght ❖ (Exclusive on Nоvеl𝚒ght) explain it in such detail, Jaegyeom raised his voice. Jeongju, with his spoon in his mouth, hummed for a moment. Then he waved his hand through the air as if he finally understood. After swallowing his food, Jeongju said,
“Ah! A kiss?!”
“Yes! That!”
They had barely arrived at the right answer. Jaegyeom nodded, relieved. Both the one who had asked and the one who had answered looked refreshed, as though a ten-year-old problem had finally been solved. Brightening, Jeongju shifted in his seat and said proudly, “Ah, I was thinking of something else~”
Mesan, excited along with them, clapped his hands too.
“Wait. Why are you asking about that, though?”
Jeongju’s expression changed completely as he asked.
“Uh...?”
“Why a kiss? What’s with that?”
Never in his dreams had Jeongju expected the word Jaegyeom was asking about to be kiss. It was something he had never shown interest in before. When Jaegyeom and Jeongju watched TV dramas together, Jeongju sometimes squealed and fussed over kissing scenes, but Jaegyeom only ever looked annoyed.
When Jeongju suddenly turned serious, Jaegyeom stammered.
“Well, I was just curious. I can ask about things.”
Jeongju narrowed his eyes at the bland excuse and stared at him.
“Over breakfast? Out of nowhere, when nothing happened?”
This fox bastard really could tuck in and unfurl his tail whenever he pleased. But even if Jaegyeom died and came back to life, he could not tell him the truth about what had happened yesterday.
“No, uh... I was passing by yesterday. Someone was doing that on the street.”
So he decided to pretend it was someone else’s story.
“Ah, really? So it surprised you?”
“Oh, yeah...”
“These days, plenty of people kiss even on the street.”
“Oh, I see. What a world. Never mind, then...”
Jaegyeom pretended nothing was wrong and answered stiffly.
“Goodness, I thought something had happened.”
Jeongju himself was familiar with modern culture. He had dated a few times, and as an actor, he had occasionally had to film kissing scenes, so he was not particularly surprised. But from Jaegyeom’s position, it probably was shocking. To old-fashioned eyes, it must be a very unfamiliar sight.
He would see it often enough if he went outside from now on. Jeongju wondered if that was why Jaegyeom had been so out of it today. Had he really been that shocked by seeing people kiss? Even though he had lived so long, he could be cute in ways like this sometimes.
Just as Jeongju, looking somewhat pleased, lifted his water glass,
“B-but they were both men.”
Jeongju spat out the water in shock. There was a splutter, a cough, then a heavy wheeze as the water went down the wrong way. When his face turned red and he started shaking, Mesan pulled out a tissue for him.
“What? They were both men?”
If that was the case, even he would be surprised. Wow. When had this country become so open? The country was making progress after all. Jeongju asked again, looking bewildered.
“Really? In the middle of the street, with people passing by?”
“Not... not the street. Somewhere in a park.”
“Street or park, wow, that is pretty surprising.”
Jeongju nodded as if he understood.
“They were both men. How can that...”
Jaegyeom lowered his gaze and trailed off miserably.
“There’s no reason they can’t. So what?”
Jeongju shrugged as he answered. He had been startled for a moment, but that was because of the boldness of kissing out in public, not because two men had been kissing. Jeongju had no particular aversion to that. His environment had a lot to do with it. Given the nature of his industry, he had heard all kinds of stories and had even received a script for a film about a same-sex relationship.
“I get that it might feel uncomfortable or that you might not like it.”
Jaegyeom said nothing in response to Jeongju’s generous words. frёeweɓηovel.coɱ
From Jeongju’s point of view, it would probably be hard for Jaegyeom to accept right away.
“It’s best to just think there are all kinds of people in the world. That way, you’ll feel more comfortable too.”
Jeongju chose to move smoothly past it, trying to match Jaegyeom’s level of understanding.
“But when you’re outside, you can’t say things like ‘I feel uncomfortable’ or ‘I don’t like it.’ Understand? The world has changed a lot now, so saying things like that out loud is embarrassing! People will think you’re ugly!”
Jeongju added in a lecturing tone.
“Save those ugly words for when you’re at home with me. I’m fine with it. Got it? Do you understand? Why aren’t you answering?”
As Jeongju nagged, Jaegyeom, who had been silent the whole time, finally snapped.
“I said I got it! And don’t make things up.”
“Why are you suddenly so irritated... When did I make anything up...”
While Jeongju mumbled in momentary confusion, Jaegyeom shot back,
“When did I say I didn’t like it?”
“Huh? What...?”
“When did I say it felt bad?”
“Well...”
With Jaegyeom’s old way of thinking, Jeongju had assumed, of course, that he would be offended.
“So you don’t feel bad?”
Jeongju asked, looking confused.
Jaegyeom sighed deeply and stood, answering, “No, I do,” which only confused Jeongju even more.
“I should feel bad. But I don’t, so I feel bad.”
Leaving those words behind, Jaegyeom went out into the yard.
