Free Web NovelHeewon lightly clenched and unclenched his hands folded behind his back. He didn’t know how to answer. Instead, he simply nodded.
“Youngjae’s illness is largely our fault. Especially Seoran feels a lot of guilt. Even though she knew he was suffering, she turned away... Maybe because she knows it’s hard to turn back, she thinks Secretary Kim is the only hope.”
Professor Kwon spoke in a heavy tone, reflecting on past mistakes. It seemed he felt largely responsible for Kwon Youngjae’s neurosis.
“How about you, Secretary Kim? Do you like Youngjae?”
“Professor, I...”
“I thought Youngjae seemed to like Secretary Kim a lot. You realize these things when you become a parent—how your child treats their partner, how they look at them.”
“......”
“I thought Secretary Kim, being perceptive, must have felt it well enough. Though maybe I’m judging too hastily.”
Hearing this, Heewon’s mind began to spin. He couldn’t simply say no, nor admit it.
It was true he had grown closer to Kwon than before. Sharing warmth, flesh; sometimes his heart unexpectedly leaned that way.
Do I like Kwon Youngjae? Does Kwon Youngjae think of me as special?
In a situation where even he couldn’t decide, he couldn’t answer recklessly. The moment he established an answer, it might become a fixed truth.
“I... don’t really know.”
In the end, he gave a lukewarm reply. freēwebnovel.com
“Is there no chance things will go well in the future?”
“......”
“I’m not forcing you. Just curious. If Secretary Kim has no intention at all...”
“Why don’t you take it easy?”
A low voice suddenly interrupted. Turning around, Heewon saw Kwon Youngjae leaning sideways against the doorframe.
He was staring icily at his father.
“Why are you two so desperate to tie us together?”
“Youngjae.”
“I’m not in that kind of relationship with Secretary Kim. I’m tired of explaining it now.”
“Youngjae, I—”
“Why should I be misunderstood even by my family? No matter what, I will never like Secretary Kim. If you were hoping, clear that up now.”
He cut off the conversation with a firm tone. Professor Kwon smiled wryly and said he would comply.
“......”
Heewon lowered his gaze and stared only at the glossy wooden floor. He was grateful the situation was settled, but he didn’t know why those words stung so much. He felt somewhat shocked. Why, exactly?
Lost in thought, Kwon Youngjae entered the study and abruptly grabbed Heewon’s wrist, pulling him close.
“Dinner is unnecessary. Since I’ve seen your face, I’ll be going.”
The words sounded harsh coming from a son to his father. Yet Kwon Youngjae left the study as if he didn’t care whether his father was hurt, and Heewon was dragged out without even greeting Professor Kwon.
The car driven by Kwon Youngjae was suffocatingly silent. Heewon quietly stared out the window. Since leaving the main house, Kwon hadn’t spoken once.
Perhaps irritated by the unusual silence, Kwon loosened the knot of his neatly tied necktie slightly. He bit his lip and spoke.
“Did you expect something?”
At that, Heewon slowly turned to look at him. Kwon continued speaking without meeting his eyes, looking straight ahead.
“It’s true we’re closer than a normal relationship, but it doesn’t mean anything special. It can break anytime.”
“......”
“The one who said we shouldn’t have foolish feelings was you, Secretary Kim.”
“I know.”
“Then why do you look like that?”
Heewon touched his face. Indeed, his expression was as stiff as Kwon pointed out. A long sigh spilled over the palm covering his mouth.
“I don’t know either.”
Months had passed since he had been physically involved with Kwon Youngjae. The number of times was too many and moments too immersed to call it a casual thing. Maybe they were even closer and more intimate than a dating couple.
The more skin he shared with Kwon, the more he couldn’t deny the feelings were special. They had agreed not to share emotional intimacy, but that was impossible from the start.
Though he knew regret was useless, if he could, he wanted to go back and erase it all.
Heewon fiddled with his cracked lips. Unable to face Kwon now, he deliberately kept his eyes on the window.
Was this physical intimacy or affection? He wasn’t even sure. I like Kwon Youngjae... no, definitely not. He kept denying it repeatedly. The dazzling city lights outside didn’t even register. His troubled thoughts kept gnawing at his mind.
After long hesitation, he finally spoke.
“Shall we stop?”
“Now?”
“I’m worried about the future. I just... think it’s better to stop now.”
“......”
The silence stretched heavily. Kwon only looked ahead and didn’t give a clear answer. He pressed the inside of his cheek with his tongue and after a long moment, spoke.
“I don’t intend to stop.”
“Executive Director.”
“Secretary Kim, change your mind too. Honestly, I don’t understand why you worry. Becoming serious is ridiculous and unrealistic, isn’t it?”
“......”
Heewon bit his trembling lips tightly. Kwon held no hope at all, making his own worries feel pointless. He understood their thoughts differed. But his heart still ached.
“I’d rather not discuss this matter anymore.”
“Are you asking that as a fuckbuddy or by Executive Director Kwon’s orders?”
Kwon glanced sideways for a moment and stared piercingly at Heewon.
“Why separate them?”
“......”
“No matter which it is, the answer Secretary Kim must give is the same.”
Heewon pursed his lips and turned his head. His will was too weak to break the stubborn man’s will. It was true he wanted to continue with Kwon, and true he worried about the future.
Looking out the window, a sorrowful sigh escaped him. He didn’t know what to do anymore.
The car soon arrived in front of the villa. The engine off, the inside was very quiet, and an awkward atmosphere flowed between them that hadn’t existed before. fгeewebnovёl.com
“Thank you for the ride.”
Heewon unbuckled the seatbelt that had been tightly binding him and greeted. As he got out, he saw Kwon opening the driver’s door behind him.
Without a word, Kwon walked ahead. He even stepped inside the lobby and got on the elevator. It was clear he intended to follow him home. Heewon wiped his face with a long, complicated sigh.
“I... have no intention of doing anything with you tonight. You should just go home.”
At that, Kwon glanced sideways. After staring silently for a long while, he brushed his hair back with fingers like hooks.
“Have dinner with me.”
“...Fine. Then.”
Heewon sighed deeply out of habit, and silence returned. Kwon rubbed his stiffening neck. The cramped space felt suffocating.
Kwon followed Heewon because he felt it wasn’t right to let him go alone like this. Not out of guilt, but because he was concerned.
Looking back, he still hadn’t received a clear answer about continuing their relationship. That’s why he felt so uneasy.
Reaching the entrance, Heewon raised his hand to the keypad. Just as he was about to enter the code, the sound of the door opening came from afar.
Someone from unit 802 appeared at just the right time.
Han Jinseo, wearing a deeply pulled hat, spotted the two and exclaimed in surprise. Without hesitation, he walked lightly toward unit 801.
From the moment the noise was heard, Kwon’s gaze had already shifted there. Seeing Han Jinseo’s smiling face, his eyes hardened fiercely.
Heewon also showed an uncomfortable expression upon spotting the neighbor. Meeting Han Jinseo would bring nothing good, and it was awkward to show Kwon being led into his home.
“Executive Director, please go home now.”
Trying to send Kwon off quickly, Heewon’s head, turned sideways, slowly faced forward. His face was terrifyingly calm. Heewon felt a sharp tension pressing down, thinking that one more word here could trigger anger.
“Executive Director, umph!”
The moment he started to speak, Kwon grabbed Heewon’s jaw, twisting it, and roughly collided his lips with his.
