Free Web NovelChapter 18: Meditation Is Bull
Meditation is bullshit.
That’s my conclusion after twenty minutes cross-legged on a yoga mat under the back deck trying to "find inner peace" while living in a house full of men who look like they were genetically engineered in a female sex fantasy lab.
River had suggested it very calmly over breakfast after I admitted my brain felt "itchy."
Which, in hindsight, was probably not medically useful terminology.
But he’d tilted his head in that quiet, watchful way he has and said, Your mind needs as much care as your body.
Cryptic forest man nonsense.
The forest behind the compound sounds different in the mornings. The type of alive that makes people nervous.
Branches creak softly overhead while sunlight spills through the trees in warm gold ribbons, birds arguing somewhere high above the canopy like tiny feathery divorcees. Wind moves through the leaves in long sighing breaths, carrying the scent of pine and damp earth and smoke from somewhere deeper in the property.
And underneath all of it, faint but constant now, them.
Something is definitely happening to me.
My senses feel too sharp, every emotion hits harder, my body reacts before my brain does. Every look and touch from them feels amplified, my nerves are exposed directly to the air.
And the horny?
Absolutely catastrophic.
I haven’t known peace since Ezra and Corrian dropped to their knees on the deck yesterday.
Which is exactly why my eyes are currently squeezed shut while I attempt to breathe through a meditation app that sounds suspiciously like a woman orgasming softly over rainforest noises.
Inhaling deeply, all I can focus on is them. I’m starting to recognize each of their scents individually, which feels like the first warning sign of complete psychological collapse.
Corrian smells of whiskey and the inside of a fireplace. Leo smells like rain and leather, wild. River is clean, cold water and forest shadows. Ezra, expensive warmth, and devotion.
And Jax...smells like trouble.
Sweet and warm and boyish in the most dangerous possible way. Sugar and bad decisions made at three in the morning.
Which is probably why he’s currently sprawled dramatically beside me on the grass whining like a neglected housewife while I attempt to meditate.
"Frankfurter," he groans for what has to be the twentieth time. "This is discrimination."
I keep my eyes closed.
"You’ll survive."
"Barely."
Without saying a word, he knew what had happened last night. And has been pouting about being left out ever since.
"Seem fine to me." I inhale, and hold it, following orgasmic voices instructions.
"I’m emotionally devastated."
I exhale, trying to force my muscles to relax one at a time. Also, something about a ball of light? I missed it because of his grumbling.
"Ezra got to eat your pussy." He huffs the words out.
My eyes snap open. "Oh my God, shhhhh." The blush is swift and I’m beet red in seconds.
Jax grins unrepentantly beside me, stretched out on his side in gray sweatpants and no shirt because apparently shirts are illegal in this house. Sunlight filters through the trees overhead, painting shifting gold across the tattoos curling over his shoulders and chest. His blond mullet is messy, several strands falling into bright mischievous eyes currently fixed on me with unbearable amusement.
"You’re blushing," he says delightedly.
"I hate this place."
"You don’t hate this place."
"I’m filing harassment charges against all of you."
Jax props himself up on one elbow dramatically. "You wound me."
I try to focus again, shifting slightly on the yoga mat beneath me. Meditation seemed like a good idea thirty minutes ago.
What River failed to mention is that attempting inner peace while living with five aggressively attractive lunatics is borderline impossible.
Especially when one of them keeps talking about my vagina.
I inhale deeply through my nose.
Exhale slowly.
Try to ignore the fact I can still vividly remember Ezra’s mouth between my thighs yesterday. The rough scrape of stubble against sensitive skin. Corrian’s hands in my hair. The filthy possessiveness in their voices.
Heat curls low in my stomach.
Fantastic.
My eyes remain closed as I mutter, "I can literally hear you pouting."
"Because I’m suffering." He whines. "You smell like them."
That makes me crack an eye open again.
Jax is genuinely sulking now. His lower lip juts out slightly while he stares at me with the wounded expression of a golden retriever denied table scraps.
"You smell like Ezra and Corrian," he complains. "It’s rude."
I snort softly. "Pretty sure I didn’t do it on purpose."
"Still rude."
He grabs the front of his sweatpants.
"And look what it’s doing to me."
I glance automatically, I swear I didn’t even want to, it’s a compulsion.
"Oh my God."
Jax beams. "Right?"
There is an entire erection happening under those sweatpants. A huge, thick, mouthwatering, veiny...
I clap a hand over my eyes while laughter bursts out of me. "Jesus Christ, Jax."
"You think this is funny?"
"Yes."
"It hurts."
"That sounds like a you problem."
He crawls closer across the grass until his head drops heavily into my lap with absolutely no warning. Warm blond hair spills across my thighs while he wraps both arms around my waist dramatically.
"You’re so cruel to me," he mumbles against my stomach.
"A massive cock, is not my problem right now."
"It’s our problem Frankfurter" He sighs. "You shouldn’t have put that sexy scene in my head."
"I didn’t." I snip back. "You guessed."
He rolls his eyes. "Anyone who gets a whiff will smell the horny on you." ƒгeewebnovёl.com
I shove at his shoulder half-heartedly while trying not to smile. "You’re ridiculous."
"And you smell good."
Jax buries his face directly against my stomach and inhales deeply. A violent shiver runs through me.
"Jax."
He groans softly. "Fuck. Yeah. Still smells like them."
"You’re freaks."
"You like us."
Unfortunately...that’s becoming impossible to deny. My chest tightens unexpectedly at the thought. Because somewhere along this very short line, this place stopped feeling temporary.
Stopped feeling fake. And like is not the right word.
