Free Web NovelChapter 21: IT WAS ENTIRELY FOR ME
Chapter 21
Lumi
Ren didn’t say a single word on the walk back to the car.
Neither did I.
The park stayed behind us. The gravel path, the pale afternoon light, Callum’s face growing smaller and smaller in the distance. I didn’t look back at any of it.
I had made a decision somewhere between Callum’s last nasty word and the moment Ren’s warm hand closed around mine: I was done looking back at a past that was finished with me.
But even with my eyes locked forward, I could still hear it.
Mama.
One word. The way it had come out of him so fast and so happy, like my name was the first thing his little mouth wanted to say the second he saw me.
I pressed my lips together and stared hard at the pavement ahead.
Ren’s hand was still holding mine. Honestly, I don’t think either of us had noticed we were still holding on.
Or maybe we had noticed, and we were both just choosing to say nothing about it. I wasn’t sure which thought made my heart race faster.
When we reached the SUV, he unlocked it. I climbed into the back seat without being asked, tucking my hands tightly into my lap just so they had somewhere to go.
He got in, started the engine, and pulled out into the street.
The London traffic moved around us in that slow, indifferent way it always did, entirely unbothered by the fact that my chest felt like someone had reached in and shattered everything inside it.
I watched a big red bus pass on my left.
Mama, look. It’s Mama. I heard his voice again
I pressed two fingers to the bridge of my nose and breathed carefully through my mouth, trying to keep the tears back.
"He recognized me," My voice came out incredibly quiet in the silence of the car.
Ren didn’t respond right away. He changed lanes, checked his mirror, and kept his eyes on the road. When he finally spoke, his voice matched mine, completely even and unhurried.
"Of course he did."
"I haven’t seen him in weeks." I dropped my hand back to my lap, gripping my coat. "I thought he might have... I don’t know... Forgotten. The way small children forget faces when enough time passes."
"He’s three," he said simply. "Not a goldfish."
A tiny, breathless sound escaped me, not quite a laugh, but close enough to take some of the weight out of the air.
"She picked him up," I whispered, the image flashing behind my eyes. "When he started crying. Sienna turned him away from me, held him, and whispered things into his ear, and I just... I couldn’t..." I stopped.
The traffic light ahead turned red, and Ren brought the car to a smooth stop. His hands rested on the steering wheel, easy and still. ƒгeewebnovёl.com
"I stood there," I said, the words tasting like ash. "I just stood there and watched her hold my son." The word came out before I could stop it.
My son.
I hadn’t said that out loud to anyone for a while. Not to Eleanor at the law office, not to Neve on the phone, not even to myself.
I had been using careful, distant terms like the child or Theo, anything to keep the painful reality at an arm’s length.
But hearing his voice in that park had completely melted whatever wall I had left.
He was mine. Whatever biological truth existed in a medical lab, whatever the DNA papers said, whatever Callum and Sienna had done behind my back—that boy had called me mama from the very first word he ever learned.
He had reached for me. He had slept on my chest. He had eaten food from my hands.
He was mine, and someone else was holding him, and there was nothing I could do about it yet.
The light changed to green, then Ren drove.
"Lumi."
"I’m fine." I say immediately.
"I didn’t ask." I turned my head and looked at him.
He was watching the road, his jaw relaxed, one hand resting on the lower half of the wheel.
"Then why did you say my name?"
"Because you were about to tell me you were fine before I even opening my mouth," he said, glancing at me briefly. "Which means you’re definitely not."
I looked back out the window, a small, sad smile touching my lips. He wasn’t wrong. Telling people I was fine was a reflex at this point.
The SUV turned off the main road into the quieter street near our hotel. The roar of the city faded a bit.
"Eleanor said we can fight for him," I reminded myself, needing to hear it again.
"You will."
"She said we have a strong case."
"You do."
"Ren." I turned to look at him properly this time. "I need you to be completely honest with me. Not nice, not reassuring. Honest." I waited until he glanced over, holding his dark eyes. "Do you really think I can win?"
He pulled into the small car park beside a street and brought the SUV to a stop. He cut the engine, turning the car completely silent.
Then, he turned fully in his seat and looked at me. It was a direct, unguarded look, and I felt the full, heavy weight of his attention.
"You walked into your husband’s office," Ren said, his voice deep and steady, "sat down in front of him and his mistress, and asked for divorce papers with the same calm face you’d use to order a coffee." He paused, letting the words sink in.
"You stood in a park today while a man tried to tear you apart with words, and you didn’t flinch. You’re fighting for a child that isn’t biologically yours because you love him and because it’s the right thing to do." He didn’t waver for a second.
"Yes, Lumi. I know you can win." I looked at him, my throat tightening.
The evening light was coming through the windshield at a low angle, cutting across the side of his rugged face and catching the dark lines of the tattoos climbing past his collar.
I thought about what Callum had said in the park, then I thought about how Ren had stepped in front of me without a single second of hesitation.
He had just moved his massive body between me and the pain, shielding me like a wall that chose to protect me.
"Thank you," I whispered. "For today. For the park. For... all of it."
As my sight caught hit his right hand on the steering wheel, my breath hitched sharply in my throat.
The sleek black leather of the wheel was slicked with a fresh, dark smear of red.
The white gauze I had wrapped around his knuckles back at the law office was completely ruined.
A heavy crimson stain was leaking straight through the center of the fabric. He had clenched his fist so hard in the park while facing Callum that the skin had split wide open again. freewёbnoνel.com
"Ren, pull over," I said, my voice leaving absolutely no room for argument.
"We’re already parked, Lumi." He didn’t look at me, his fingers tightening on the wheel. The pressure forced even more blood to ooze through the white threads.
"Then let go of the wheel. You’re bleeding right through the dressing."
"It’s just skin," he rumbled, his tone completely dismissive. "It’ll stop when it runs out of blood."
A sudden, sharp spark of anger lit up in my chest. I didn’t ask him again. I clicked my seatbelt free.
Ren’s dark eyes snapped toward me, his brow furrowing in confusion. "Lumi, what the hell are you..."
Before he could finish, I gripped the dashboard, hoisted my body right over the center console, and climbed straight into the passenger seat beside him.
I settled into the leather, immediately reaching down into the plastic bag on the floorboard to pull out the fresh tape and antiseptic.
"You are incredibly stubborn," I muttered.
"Look who’s talking," he rumbled back.
He didn’t move away, though. Instead, he let his right hand drop off the steering wheel, resting it palm-up on the console between us. It was a silent, slightly grumpy surrender.
I took his wrist. His skin felt burning hot against my fingertips. Carefully, I began to snip away the blood-soaked gauze, exposing the raw, jagged cuts across his knuckles.
My heart gave a heavy, aching throb at the sight. He had done this to his own body because he couldn’t bear the words Callum used to hurt me.
I poured the cool antiseptic directly over the raw skin. He didn’t even flinch, didn’t hiss or wince, he just sat there in the dimming light of the car, watching my face while I worked.
"Let’s work on getting your Theo," he whispered.
I kept my eyes on his hand, making sure my fingers stayed entirely steady as I laid down the first layer of clean white gauze.
"No more running. No more hiding. I want you to get your son back." He continued.
I nodded. "Deal,"
"Deal" he confirmed. I looked up, meeting his dark eyes. There was no doubt in them. He wasn’t just agreeing, he was making a vow to me.
A small, tight knot in my throat finally loosened, and I managed to breathe. I nodded again, wrapping the medical tape firmly around his palm to secure the bandage.
"But first," I continued, my voice hardening as I thought about Callum’s arrogant face,
"I want to cut every single tie between me and that man. I want the divorce finalized, the assets split, my name changed back. I don’t want to be linked to him by a single thread before I take Theo. I want him completely out of my life."
"Good," Ren rumbled, his thick fingers twitching slightly under mine. "He doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as you, let alone share a last name."
I finished tucking the edge of the tape down and gently let go of his wrist. My skin felt suddenly cold the moment the contact broke.
Ren rested his newly bandaged hand easily on his thigh, the hard tension in his shoulders relaxing just a bit.
To fill the quiet space in the car, I reached out and tapped the power button on the dashboard radio. I turned the dial slowly, bypassing the loud rock stations and the heavy talking channels, searching for something specific.
I stopped when a soft, acoustic melody began to drift through the speakers. It was a slow, beautiful song about gratitude, about finding a safe harbor after a massive, terrifying storm. A thank-you song.
I leaned my head back against the headrest, keeping my eyes fixed on the passing shadows of the London buildings outside, but I made sure the station stayed right where it was.
I wanted that song to play. I wanted him to hear it. It was the only way I knew how to tell him what his presence next to me truly meant without stumbling over my words.
From the corner of my eye, I saw he shift in his seat.
He glanced over at me, tracking the soft expression on my face, and then looked down at the radio screen where the lyrics were softly scrolling. He understood exactly what I was doing.
For a second, I thought he would ignore it, or hide behind that tough, unreadable mask he usually wore like armor.
Instead, a slow, genuine smile broke across his rugged features. It completely softened the harsh, dangerous lines of his jaw, making his dark eyes brilliant in the dashboard light.
It was a small, private smile, and it was entirely for me.
I tucked my chin into the collar of my heavy coat, trying to hide the sudden, wild racing of my own heart, and just let the music carry us through the quiet evening.
